“He said that when he was dying, but now he is better. We needn’t marry.”
“I would beg to differ given recent events.”
Amelia’s mouth popped open to refute him, but he was right. “There is something strong between us, I won’t ignore that, but that doesn’t mean we must marry or deny what we feel. You haven’t married every woman you’ve dallied with.”
“You are not just any woman. You’re not a widow, not are you a woman who is outside the expectations of society. I cannot simply dally with you.”
“What about what I want? How am I supposed to ignore these feelings? I can’t go back now. I want you to touch me, kiss me. I want you to need me like I need you.”
He pressed a hand to his brow. “Amelia...” He turned away toward the window, but Amelia grabbed his lapel and made him face her.
“Listen to me.”
He leaned toward her. “No, you listen to me. I will not defile you, insult your brother, and risk the ruin of your reputation for a bit of dalliance. So unless you will marry me, this stops.”
Whas he asking or giving her an ultimatum?
“You don’t want to marry me, Graham. Whatever was the cause of our animosity before, it fed on our differences which already existed. It was easy for me to stoke your ire, and you knew exactly how to make me feel smaller.”
“Amelia, I never wanted that. I admit I did it badly, but I was fighting a battle every moment I was around you. But you’re right. We are too different to get along in a marriage. You’re vibrant like a rainbow and I’m... gray through and through.”
Amelia shook her head at him. “You really believe that?”
“I was burning for you. I didn’t want Alston to know. I didn’t want him to think I was panting after your skirts like a lecher, like every other man at your come-out ball. You’ve made it clear how dull I am and you’re not wrong. I’m a simple man with simple needs except when it comes to you. But a marriage cannot be sustained on passion alone.”
She yanked him closer. “You’re not just gray, Graham. You’ve got colors of your own. They may not be the same shades as mine, but you’re still beautiful. You’re are shades of earth like the sea green of your eyes.” She ran her hand through his hair and thought she felt him shudder. “You’re warm mahogany with licks of red and orange like autumn leaves. You’re smooth white marble and the dark gray of unbreakable steel.” She wanted him so badly her body ached with a hollowness only he could appease.
He closed his eyes. “Amelia, don’t tempt me.”
“Tempt you? You make me feel such wicked things I don’t know what to do.” She wanted to climb into his lap and let this desire consume both of them, but she knew he’d resist.
“This is why we have to stop,” he warned, opening his eyes and pinning her with his stare. “You don’t know the perils of succumbing to lust like I do.”
“This doesn’t feel like peril. Graham, if we set aside our differences and just for this moment you could have me, what would you do? If you’re burning, I’m burning too. But we can burn together—we don’t have to resist this.”
The carriage grew silent, the outside world muted as the sound of his breath quickened.
His breath fanned her neck, and she tilted her head to the side, enjoying the warm caress. His nose brushed the skin just under her ear, a delightfully sensitive place. She gripped his lapel tighter, arching her neck more.
“Don’t do this,” he said, his lips brushing her skin.
“What am I doing?”
His arm snaked around her. “You know exactly what you’re doing.”
“How can I? According to you, I am the epitome of all things naïve and innocent.” Her lips brushed his ear.
He growled, the vibration sending shivers over her skin.
“Do you know what you do to me?” she whispered. “I feel hot and liquid. My body wants to melt into yours. Why is that?”
“You are overcome because you are not used to it. I’m older than you, and I have more experience in these matters. It’s dangerous to let ourselves succumb to these feelings. We can’t keep doing this. There are repercussions—devastating, life altering consequences that will hurt you much more than me. I’m trying so desperately to keep you safe, Amelia.”
“I am safe with you.”
He pulled away, just enough to meet her eyes. “Do you truly believe that?”
Amelia cupped his face. “I do.” Didn’t he know this?
