I need you.
But he said it in his mind where an inferno of pain and anguish swirled in a never-ending firestorm. He felt like Sisyphus, steadily rolling a rock uphill, only to have it roll back down again and start all over. He just wanted to know himself again, and he wanted Willa to be there when it happened.
Chapter 16
Hours later, after the sun had set, Willa accepted a dinner tray from Mrs. Davies.
“How is his lordship?” Mrs. Davies asked.
“He still has a fever, but he's resting comfortably.”
“Might I suggest a tepid bath to cool him down? We've got a large tub.”
A bath? That sounded divine to Willa. “I don't want to impose,” Willa said.
“I’ll have my husband bring the tub at once, and I’ll heat the water only slightly. We don't want to give him a chill, now do we? I’m so glad Dr. Smith isn’t one of those traditional doctors who bleed their patients. It's never done anyone any good.”
“Thank you,” Willa said. She went to his side after Mrs. Davies left and felt his chest again and around his neck. He was warm, frightfully so, but he didn't seem uncomfortable. He wasn't thrashing about the bed in a feverish delirium.
Willa lightly shook his shoulder. “Are you able to wake?”
He turned his head to the side toward her voice. “What?”
“Mrs. Davies brought up our dinner, and I think… you should have a tepid bath to help bring down the fever.”
“A bath?” he replied, his voice thick with sleep.
Willa hated to rouse him from sleep, but he needed some sustenance if he was going to fight the infection and heal.
“A bath sounds wonderful, as does food, but so does more sleep,” he said.
She smiled. “How about food first, a bath, and then back to sleep?”
She couldn't see much through the slashes where his eyes were, but she could feel his gaze. His hand reached for hers, and their fingers knitted together. Her heart thumped wildly. Did he know he was doing this? Did he feel what she was feeling? This growing tenderness, attraction, whatever it could be called. It frightened her, not because it felt wrong, but because it was so fast and so strong, and yet there was something so comfortable about it. Like a favorite blanket. He made her feel warm and safe as if he'd been there all along. Familiar to her, even though they were strangers before.
They ate, and Mrs. Davies and her husband returned, filling up the tub by the hearth. Willa moved the screen to shield the tub from view of the bed. She drew the chair near so he would have something to help him balance as he undressed.
She sat on the foot of the bed, waiting anxiously as the sounds of clothing being removed reached her ears. She could see his shadow clearly. First, he removed his jacket and then his waistcoat. He paused, holding onto the chair and taking a few deep breaths.
“Are you all right?” Willa asked.
“I'm fine. I just… I got a little dizzy,” he said.
Willa licked her lips, her pulse escalating. “Do you need my help?”
“I think I might.”
She slowly rose to her feet and went around the screen.
“I'm sorry, I know it's not appropriate.”
“It’s fine. I grew up on a farm,” she replied, hoping that was enough reassurance for him.
Her hands trembled as she reached for his shirt, tugging the fabric from his breeches. His clothing needed to be laundered again, she reminded herself, trying to distract herself with tomorrow's plans. She could do it while he was in bed resting or while the doctor was visiting. She bit her lip, focusing on the soft white fabric. His scent clung to it, a mesmerizing blend of man and sun-bleached cotton. She'd tried to wash out the stains of blood but a brownish tint remained. He would need a new shirt. If only they had the money for fresh clothing.
It might help him feel better before they reached London.
“Is the room too warm?” she asked.
