‘Cammy, mate, how are you? Good to see you.’ Neil, the restaurant manager, was a regular customer at the shop and straight out of the Cammy school of suave élan. He spotted Josie and Val and immediately opened his arms, giving them hugs and double kisses. Neither refused.
‘Och, son, if I was twenty years younger and single,’ Val told him.
Josie shook her head. ‘Och no, Val. They’re all into filming it these days – sex tapes. I’d rather watchEmmerdale.’
Cammy looked at Neil with an expression of desperation. ‘Save me. Please. I’ll give you anything you want.’
‘Not enough money in the world, pal,’ he said, laughing, earning a nudge of rebuke from Val.
‘Anyway, so listen, I was going to call you just to let you know we’ve had to tweak a couple of things tonight,’ Neil said, with a definite hint of apology.
Cammy’s face fell. What the fuck was going on today? Was this one of those shows where a hidden camera follows someone and throws all sorts of crap in their way just to get a reaction out of them?
‘What’s happened?’ he asked, fearful of the answer.
‘The French football team are over here, playing Scotland at Hampden on Sunday.’
‘Yeah, I’ve had a couple of them in the shop. Spent a fortune.’
‘They’re coming here for dinner tonight,’ Neil added, then let that sink in for a moment.
Grilled was romantic. It was intimate. It was exclusive. It was the perfect place for a proposal. Not, however, if two dozen bloody French football players were taking up the rest of the fricking restaurant. For Christ’s sake, this was a nightmare. And now he was torn between a rock and a French bloody hard place.
This was Lila’s favourite restaurant, so he knew it was where she would want her engagement to happen. But on the other hand, it could be completely ruined by a crowd of blokes discussing their tactics for World Cup qualification.
Bollocks. This wasn’t going well.
‘But look, I said I’d take care of you and I will,’ Neil promised hurriedly, trying to salvage the situation. ‘I’ve allocated them one section of the restaurant, and I’ve booked you Lila’s favourite table in the window. With any luck, you won’t even notice they’re there.’
He sounded more optimistic than confident. The restaurant was small, maybe 100 covers at most. Cammy reckoned the chances of not noticing an influx of international sportsmen were slim to none – approximately the same as the chances of anything going right today.
But what choice did he have? If he swapped restaurants at this late stage, there was every bit as much of a chance that it could all go wrong because he hadn’t had time to prepare it properly. At least here he’d already picked the champagne, the table decorations, and organised for the ring to be brought out with dessert.
The ring.
That jogged his memory and made the decision for him. He was just going to stick to the plan and hope for the best.
‘Look, let’s just go with the original plan,’ he announced to Neil, noticing that even Josie and Val weren’t commenting on the latest twist of doom. Maybe it was those two that were causing this with their subliminal vibes. Jinx One and Jinx Two. ‘Man, first the ring disaster and now this…’
‘What happened with the ring?’ Neil asked, curious.
‘Shop shut down. Owner did a runner,’ Val announced, like aCrimewatchpresenter delivering the facts of an open case.
‘Had to buy another one instead,’ Cammy added.
‘Unlucky, mate,’ Neil whistled. ‘Not going well, is it?’
‘Had better days,’ Cammy agreed. ‘But hey, it can only pick up from here.’ He was crossing his fingers as he said it, whiledeciding that all facts from here on would be double-checked. ‘Right, so we’ll come in for dinner. The table will have her favourite white flowers. The champagne will be on ice. Oh, and her parents will be joining us, so we need the table to be set for four.’
Neil looked like he was about to object, then clearly decided not to kick a man when he was down and adjusted his response. ‘No worries, I’ll make that happen.’
Cammy carried on. ‘I’ll bring the ring with me and give it to you. Then, after the meal, when the waiter or waitress brings out dessert, they will also deliver a silver tray and the ring will be on it.’
To their credit, neither Josie or Val came out with a single sarcastic comment at that point. Perhaps they were mellowing. Or coming down with a dose of romance. Or lockjaw.
‘And then I’ll ask her to marry me and she’ll say yes, and we’ll live happily ever after, while doing our damnedest…’ he pointed to Josie and Val, ‘to avoid these two.’
Neil nodded thoughtfully. ‘I think that about covers it. Don’t worry about a thing. I’ve got this and I’ll make sure it’s everything you hoped it would be.’
