Sophie, oh God, my Sophie.Her sweet little face fills my mind, her smile so bright and beautiful when we were happy, and her devastation when I told her I cheated, and that hergetting her breasts cut off changes things for me. Her righteous fury when telling me to get out of the apartment.
I destroyed the sweetest woman I've ever known, and now my career is hanging by a thread, held up only because a union contract makes me just that much harder to fire.
"Is that why you wanted me? Because of my job? Because of money?" I ask Elise finally.
The question weighs heavily between us, and I already know the answer. I know why Elise wanted me, why she pursued me. There are countless single men in Starling Cove, but she pursued me.
And I let her.
Her face blanches, and she steps toward me, but I just step back, out of reach.
"Paul, no," Elise coos, her eyes wide as she tries to smile at me. "No, I... what we have is real. You said it yourself, you can breathe with me. You're happy with me. You said that, remember?"
"Yeah, I did say that."
Did I mean it?
I convinced myself I did, now with the fog lifted...
Was Elise air, or was she a way out that I mistook for salvation?
"We'll figure this out," she insists, smiling at me, calm and assured, but her voice shakes at the edges.
I can see her so clearly, but I can also see myself, and we're both absolute disasters that destroy anything unfortunate enough to cross our paths.
She reaches for me, but I move away from her touch once more.
"You still have your job. Once this probation thing blows over, we'll be fine. We just need to keep our heads down—"
The cracks deepen when I step back a couple of steps andhead toward the car. She quickens her pace and steps beside me.
Her grin becomes reptilian as she hisses at me, "Don't you dare go soft on me now, Paul. You don't get to leave me in this mess alone. Don't you forget that I just listened to your sob stories—you're the one who panted after me like a dog. You're the one who left your precious Sophie.You kissed me first."
"You're right," I nod, slide into the driver's seat, and don't say another word. She quickly slides into the passenger seat, and her smile falters for the first time, panic flickering through her eyes like a candle in a draft. She doesn't want me. She wants what I can still give her—money, stability, a place to land, a moldable man.
And I let her use me, because deep down, I wanted to be used.
???
"Pack your shit and get out."
"You can't just kick me out!" Elise shrieks.
"Uh, I actually can, since your name isn't on the lease, and even if it was, you violated it by moving someone in without permission," Rhea smiles sweetly, tossing another box in the pile and dusting off her hands. "Here, I even got boxes for you and labeled them. Now pack up and get the fuck out."
We had just gotten home, and Rhea was already waiting for us in the living room, placing a cardboard box on a stack of boxes already labeledShe-DevilandDickless Wonder.
I guess I'm Dickless Wonder.
"I let you live here because you were desperate and I was feeling charitable," Rhea says, her lip curling in disgust as she looks at us. "But that's over. Time for you to go."
"I'll call Don—" Elise hisses at Rhea, who shrugs, crossing her tattooed arms over her chest.
"Told him all about you and Romeo over here. And I meaneverything. Every grimy little detail." She smirks, her voice laced with a delighted glee. "He said not to let the door hit you on the way out. Also said—and I quote—'Tell those cheating assholes not to try to rent in this town again because hell will freeze over before they find willing tenancy.'"
Elise lets out a strangled scream, but I'm moving down the hallway to the bedroom, the sound of them going back and forth becoming muffled.
My bags are still in the corner of the room, and I grab them before I walk to the closet, grabbing my clothes and shoving them in. When I grab my Red Sox hoodie, I freeze, before bringing it to my nose and catching a very faint scent of Sophie's favorite laundry detergent still clinging to the threads.
