I've learned that I'm much stronger than I even realized. Before, I had faith in myself and confidence that I would be able to make it through this journey. I would be a little beaten down but not out. I was terrified, but I still put one foot in front of the other and moved forward. And I feel as though I'm at the top of the ride, looking down at the drop, and ready to just let go and face it. The surgery is the bridge between chemo and radiation, and I'm ready to get this done and over with.
So that I can continue with my life. This life that I'm building, that I'm so excited to experience fully, without limits, without cancer lingering in the back of my mind.
"Two of Cups. A bond. Chosen. Mutual. Not rescue—true partnership. Not just in romance, but also in friendships."
And I discovered love beyond my wildest dreams.
Through this chaos, I fell in love with a man who showed up for me, who remained steadfast through every new curveballlife tried to throw at me, at us. And still, he just stayed steady and loving. Not only what he's done for me, but who he is as a person. Callum is so kind to everyone he encounters. He's loyal, trustworthy, and honest. I've never laughed harder around someone before, especially when he accidentally puts his whole foot in his mouth and blushes beet red. We like the same movies, books, and music. We hold the same values. We want the same things in the future—travelling, settling down, marriage, maybe kids if my body allows it.
"Could I read your tarot again?" Maeve asks, with a smile. "With my beautiful, brand new deck?"
"Of course," I say, warmth swelling in my chest. Maeve picks up the tarot, the wooden cards whispering against one another as she shuffles them with practiced grace.
The designs catch the candlelight—etched suns, constellations, soft washes of color burned into the wood. I cut the deck, place my hand on top for a moment, grounding myself, and Maeve flips the first card.
"The Empress," Maeve hums, her face brightening like she's been waiting for this one. "The Divine Feminine. Even in change, you are still whole—still Sophie."
My breath catches in my throat. The Empress's figure looks serene and maternal on the card, surrounded by stars and crescent moons. She looks incredibly feminine and beautiful, exactly how I wish to feel after this surgery.
Maeve turns the next card. "The Nine of Wands," she says thoughtfully. "Resilience and perseverance after this long battle. But you are right on the cusp of victory."
I feel that same feeling I felt all those months ago during my very first reading with her. I hadn't really believed back then, but Maeve was so kind, so warm, and I thought it could be fun. But the impact—the words she gave me, the ones that tuckedthemselves quietly into my mind and flared when I needed them.
When I went to the first book club meeting.
When I saw Paul kissing Elise outside Haunts.
When I confessed to Callum that I wasn't okay.
When my hair started falling out.
When Callum shaved my head.
When I confronted Elise at the store.
When I confessed my love for Callum.
When I confronted Paul.
All these moments where I could have backed down, run away, crumbled weak to the ground.
But I didn't.
And look at me now.
Maeve flips the next card, and her lips curl into a knowing smile. "The Lovers," she announces.
Immediately, I glance behind me, and of course, Callum is already looking with a soft smile on his face.Okay?He mouths, and I nod, blowing a kiss to him. His cheeks darken, and I turn back to Maeve, hearing Tonya rib him.
Maeve chuckles, "Self-explanatory, my dove."
Maeve flips the last card and blinks in surprise. The air around us feels charged, and I pick up the card, drawn to it immediately. The intricate wood-burned sun design glows beneath my fingers, the paint warm oranges and yellows.
"The Sun," I read the text at the bottom, and glance back up at Maeve, whose eyes are glowing almost golden in the warm candlelight.
"Joy. Good fortune. Warmth returning after a long winter," Maeve says, reaching out and laying a warm hand over mine. "The Sun doesn't appear for those destined to stay in the dark."
"Thank you, Maeve," I whisper, and she squeezes my hand once.
