Sophie is soft and warm, cuddled up against me. Her little puffs of breath tickle the hair on my chest, and sometimes she makes these little noises—squeaks, murmurs, intelligible words.
I close my eyes, and I breathe, and Ifeel. I let myself feel it all. The emotions running through me. Her scent. Her warmth. Her soft, sleepy noises.
This is a sense of peace I didn't think evenexisted.
And yet, here it is, in my arms.
A raw, physical yearning spreads through me—not for sex...though that too—my Sophie is lovely and sexy—but more for permanence. A need for Sophie's face to be the first thing I see when I open my eyes and the last thing I see before falling asleep.
After our bath last night, I had bundled my sleepy girl in the plush hotel towels and carried her back to bed. Sophie was completely pliant as I helped dress her in pajamas while she wrapped her scarf around her head. We didn't speak; there was no need. The stillness between us felt unnecessary to disturb as we got ready for bed.
Walking around the room, I turned off each of the LED candles, shooting a look at Sophie when she tried to get upto help. She smiled, chagrinned, and cuddled under the covers, lifting them for me when I crawled into bed.
Sleep came in no time at all, the day catching up with us quickly. Apparently, we must not have moved much in the night because we're in the same position we fell asleep in—Sophie's head on my chest, our hands locked together, her little cold feet being warmed against my legs. I tilt my head to see her face better and suppress a laugh when I see her face still half-smushed into my chest, mouth slightly open, and...yep, she's drooling on me.
I can't help but think back to when she first fell asleep on me.Was that really only weeks ago?It feels as though Sophie has always been a part of my life. I can't really remember much before her. Well, I can, but it just feelsmutedwithout her presence.
With Sophie, life is full of color, joy, excitement, and passion.
Last night's memories play in my mind like a movie, over and over again.
She loves me.Sophie loves me.
Those words were spoken like they were merely a fact and fell so easily from her lips. I've known I've loved her for weeks, but I think it started ever since I first laid eyes on her. A small seed that was cared for and encouraged to grow. It was so easy to tell her that I loved her back.
Because I do, more than anything.
Sophie isitfor me—the love of my life, the one I've been waiting for.
I lean down and place a kiss on her scarf-covered head, gently squeezing her and just... remembering.
The way that she looked last night.
When she stepped out of the bathroom in her pink dress, all I could do was stare at her. She always looks beautiful, but lastnight was different. There was a radiance about her, a lightness from letting go of all worries to just be happy in the moment.
She laughed loudly and unapologetically. She danced with me, her face lit up with the brightest smile. She spoke to survivors and those currently battling with such compassion and empathy. She ate all of her food without having to stop because the nausea became too much.
It was like last night, the cancer, the sickness, the fear didn't exist.
It was just my girl and me at an event with our friends.
Then theafter...
My half-hard dick twitches in my boxers, and I close my eyes, leaning down to take in her warm vanilla scent—which doesn't help my situation, but I don't really care.
My Sophie, my minx.When she takes control with that quiet confidence, telling me what she wants and what she needs me to do to make her feel good, it makes me lose my fucking mind.
I think about the words that I said last night, slurred and half-crazed-sounding, I bet.
"That's it, that's good, baby... keep rubbing your pretty little clit."
"Show me how pretty you come."
I'veneverspoken words like that while in bed, probably because the times I had sex before weren't anything like what I've experienced with Sophie.
With Sophie, it's passion, fire, energy, and a complete lack of self-consciousness. I wasn't worried aboutanythingbut giving her pleasure. I could turn my brain off and feel. And from there, my confidence grew. It felt as natural as breathing or walking to make love to Sophie.
And I knew of the great privilege it was to be able to touch this extraordinary woman—this woman who loves me.
