Illias nodded then carried on to the exit, pausing when he heard combined footsteps. Daring a look over his shoulder as he opened the door, he saw Cantrell and Father Rier walking towards the stairs that lead to the second floor of the church. Illias blew out a breath through his nose, shaking his head, and walked out into the summer heat.
A shadow fell over Illias, shielding him from the harsh rays of the sun. He looked up from his hands—fingers a little tender and raw from twisting his rings—to see Cantrell with a box of miscellaneous items and no Roman collar. “Well,” Cantrell sighed, shifting the box in his arms. “I’ve been unofficially laicized, but Rier has agreed to not investigate the reasoning for me leaving. I’m not certain how things will play out from here.”
“There’s one thing I know for certain,” Illias said, standing up. He took the box from Cantrell then set it on the steps. “I can finally do this.”
He grabbed Cantrell by the front of his shirt and kissed him in front of the church, right beneath the gaze of God.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Cantrell
“Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.”
Psalm 37:4 KJV
Two months after leaving the church, Bishop Carter agreed to meet to discuss the transfer of Saint Anthony’s ownership. Cantrell—accompanied by Illias’ stepfather, Charity, and Illias—sat in a small office on the second floor of Revived Faith. Illias hovered behind Cantrell’s chair, a comforting hand resting on his shoulder. Charity, who agreed to be on the board of directors before Cantrell was told about the plan, stood next to Illias. Henry sat next to Cantrell, briefcase in lap and reading glasses sitting on the end of his nose while he went through documents to make sure they were all signed in the correct spot. Meanwhile Bishop Carter, sitting on the other side of the largemahogany desk between them, took a sip from a teacup while examining Cantrell.
“You look good, Cantrell,” Bishop Carter said with a small smile. “I can tell you’ve been sleeping better.”
“Thank you. It seems odd to say but laicization has been…good for me,” Cantrell responded. “It wasn’t easy at first, but I’m learning to be a layman day by day.”
Bishop Carter nodded, humming in agreement. “I’ve had friends leave the clergy before. It’s never easy to acclimate back into regular life. But I imagine”—he looked over Cantrell’s shoulder and Cantrell knew the bishop was looking at Illias— “having someone to rely on has made it bearable.”
Illias squeezed Cantrell’s shoulder. He lifted his hand and rested it on top of Illias’. “I’m thankful for everyone who has helped me since I’ve left the church. The volunteers at Saint Anthony’s especially. They’ve been extraordinarily kind and patient.”
“I’m glad the shelter has still been good to you. I hope it continues to do so.” Bishop Carter opened a drawer, grabbing something out of Cantrell’s sight. He held up a small, thick leather-bound notebook and offered it to Cantrell.History of Saint Anthony’swas inscribed in golden cursive across the front.
Cantrell accepted the book. “Thank you.” He swallowed back the lump that formed in his throat. “For everything. I’m honored that you’ve entrusted me with your life’s work.”
“Ourlife’s work, Cantrell. You’ve served Saint Anthony as long as I did before I became bishop. I can rest easy now, knowing the shelter is in better hands,” Bishop Carter said, leaning back in his chair. “But do expect the occasional visit,” he added with an air of teasing.
“I would hope so.” Cantrell nodded.
“That settles it then,” Henry announced abruptly, shutting his suitcase with an audibleclick. “I’ll get this filed at the office first thing tomorrow. Congratulations, Mr. Koller, Ms. Monroe—”
“Charity,” she snipped. “Ms. Monroe makes me sound old.”
Henry sighed as he removed his glasses. “As I was saying, you two are now the proud co-founders of a non-profit organization.”
Bishop Carter stood, followed by Cantrell and Henry. “It was a pleasure, Mr. Koller,” he said to Henry, shaking his hand. “Thank you for putting together such a detailed agreement for us.”
“I’ll pass along the praise, I’m only the suit,” Henry clarified.
“Cantrell.” Bishop Carter took Cantrell’s hand. “I hope life continues to treat you well. May God always be with you.”
“And may God be with you,” Cantrell echoed.
The group filed out of Bishop Carter’s office and out of the church. Crisp autumn wind picking up the scattered leaves in the parking lot. Cantrell stood at the top of the stairs, watching Illias say his goodbyes to Henry and Charity. Soaking in the realization that not only did he leave the church, but he managed to keep the two most important things to him. Saint Anthony’s and Illias. His soul and his heart. Never again would he have to pick one over the other, nor could they be taken from him. Both were his for the keeping.
Cantrell gazed at Illias and Charity talking animatedly as they always did. She peered over at Cantrell, eyes filled with a knowing look that no longer instilled fear. Rather, it reaffirmed his sense of security, of belonging. Something he didn’t realize he had been missing until she welcomed him with open arms when Illias introduced Cantrell as hispartner. It was a strange feeling at first. Being called Illias’ partner. Surreal. Dreamlike. But it wasn’t a dream.
He’s really mine, Cantrell thought, admiring the way Illias’ buttoned shirt strained across his chest as he stretched.And tonight, I’ll finally show him.
Charity cupped her hands by Illias’ ear and whispered something. He shoved her arm, mumbling something Cantrell couldn’t hear. Charity’s laughter met Cantrell’s ears, only making him more curious. She hugged Illias, whispering something else that made Illias push her away and his blush deepen. “Goodbye,” Illias announced loud enough for Cantrell to hear.
“Bye Cantrell!” Charity beamed, waving enthusiastically. “I’ll see you on Monday.”
“See you Monday. Drive safe,” Cantrell said with a smile, waving back. He walked to Illias, waiting patiently for Charity to be out of earshot. Once she was inside her car, Cantrell leaned close to Illias’ ear. “Want to tell me what Charity said that has you blushing like a schoolboy?”
