He leans up and kisses my lips. It’s a gentle kiss, but I want more, and yet I want to linger here too. His lips brush against mine, his breath heating me from the inside out. Why are we bothering with dinner again?
“I’m glad you’re here with me, Stella.”
“Me too.”
He slides his arms around me and lifts me out of the truck until my feet touch the ground. “Let’s eat. I’m starving.”
When we enter, we’re seated immediately even though there’s a long line to get into the place. They must have recognized his name on the reservation. The hostess seems to be lingering a little too long after seating us as well, batting her eyelashes at Alex and giggling like a fangirl.Hello, I’m right here, I want to say. What is it with women today? The girl blinks like twenty times. Her eyes move from Alex to me then back to Alex.
Then she has the nerve to point and ask, “That’syour girlfriend?”
“Yes, it is. Can you leave us to our dinner? Please?” he asks politely.
She huffs, then stomps away. I roll my eyes while Alex apologizes. I assure him that it’s not his fault. After we order, we sit in silence. It’s not uncomfortable silence, but it’s strange since we usually have so much to talk about. In retrospect, I don’t think we’ve had any trouble talking to one another since the first day we met. I’ve felt at ease with him from the very beginning. Why is he so quiet now? I bring up several things about geology class, and he just nods and says things like “Uh-huh” and “Yep.” The food comes, and that helps ease the tension that I feel. Alex orders the world’s biggest steak, and I order a grilled chicken breast with a side of steamed veggies. Even though my mom is not my favorite person, I still can’t seem to break away from her years of brainwashing—err, I mean guidance about healthy eating.
As we eat, there’s more silence, and it’s deafening. I’ve run out of mundane things to talk about, and I’m starting to feel self-conscious. Am I a terrible date? I must be boring as hell either that or he regrets bringing me. Or worse, he’s embarrassed to be seen with me.
Why do I keep putting myself through things like this? I know it’ll end in pain. Mine. Tears prick my eyes. Where didthey come from? No matter, I can’t stop them. He doesn’t notice though because he isn’t even looking at me. His eyes are roaming around the restaurant. Is he hoping he doesn’t see anyone he knows?
I can’t take it. It’s too much.
I set my fork down and choke out, “I’m not feeling well.”
I get up abruptly, grab my purse, and rush to the entrance of the restaurant. I wish I had my own car then I could get away from here. Maybe I can grab a cab if I head out toward the main road. As I turn to move in that direction, big arms wrap around my waist.
“Leave me alone, Alex. I need to go.”
Lifting me off the ground, he carries me to a secluded spot at the side of the building. So embarrassing.
Setting me down, he turns me until I’m facing him. “Stella, what happened? Did I do something?”
“Did you do something?” Yes. No. That’s just it. He didn’tdoanything. He didn’t speak to me or look at me. “No.”
“Then what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” I shake my head, but I know he won’t let me leave until I explain. “I guess I’m a boring date. I’m sorry for that. I’ve never been on a date before, and I must not have done it right.”
“What do you mean you’ve never been on a date before? Didn’t you date?—”
“Yes, jeez, I dated him for a year, but we never actually went on ‘a date,’” I say with air quotes. “He usually just came over to my house and watched television.”
“What the hell, Pixie? What were you doing with that guy all of that time?” He sounds pissed.
That’s when I lose it. “It’s not like people were banging down my door to ask me out. They weren’t, Alex. You might as well know that you’re on a date with a fat loser. Wait, you already know that. You could barely look at me through dinner.You wouldn’t talk to me. I’m sorry I’m such an embarrassment to you too.” I hiccup and start an all-out sob. I think the last time I cried this hard I was standing in front of Alex the day we met. Great. Just great.
“Embarrassment? Why would you say such a thing, Stella?”
I can barely talk through the bawling, but I try to get it out through rapid breaths.
“Because everyone is embarrassed to be seen with me.” I’ve worked myself into such a crying jag that I can’t catch my breath now.
He wraps his arms around me, pulling me into him.
“I’m sorry. I was the one that was the terrible date. Honestly, it was because I had a hard-on the size of Pike’s Peak. I kept looking at you in that dress, and I couldn't concentrate on anything else. I started to look at other things in the restaurant to get the thing to go down, if you know what I mean. But then you were talking, and it seems even your little voice makes me excited.”
“Huh?” I say through sniffles.
“Honey, I’m so sorry. I’m the one who ruined our date. My mind has been on getting you naked, not on conversation.”
