“Why?” Matilda says in the sexiest fucking voice I’ve ever heard. Then she licks my neck below my ear. “This is fun.”
“Fuck, honey.”
It’s getting so intense in the cab of my pickup, the windows are covered in steam. The fact the windows are tinted helps obscure us from view. “Matilda?”
“I know.” She sits back so her luscious ass is resting on my thighs. “Too bad you didn’t confess your feelings on Friday.” Then she laughs.
I swear I could hammer a nail with my dick right now, so what she’s saying isn’t all that funny. But I chuckle anyway.
“Let’s go get some breakfast.”
“I could eat.”
Oh, fuck.
ChapterThirty-Nine
Matilda
One MonthLater
Alec has beentrue to his word. He’s been attentive in all the right ways, well, except the ones that are in-person. He writes me letters, at least one per week. He calls each evening before his shift, most of which are video calls so I can see his handsome face. He sends texts all day long too. All his efforts to keep in touch have been wonderful and effective.
I crossed over into love almost immediately after leaving in November, but if I’m being honest, I loved him before heading home to Chicago. I was just confused about everything that had happened and needed time to process. The thing is, I haven’t said the word back to him yet. I don’t know why. Fear, perhaps? He always signs his letters with the word and tells me before we hang up from our calls.
It’s time I reciprocate because, God, I miss him. Seems hard to believe I could miss someone I correspond with all day every day, but I do. I want the tangible part of Alec too. Who wouldn’t? I want to smell him, touch him, and feel his arms around me. And I want the other stuff too, the sexy parts. I know he wants that too. He’s been trying to get weekend leave, but it’s not easy. Other MPs want it too. He’s got to wait his turn, I guess.
It sucks, but he’s only got a little over six months left in the army, and then he’s out. While I know it’s not far off, it feels like it’ll be a million years before he’s home. Then what happens? Long distance isn’t ideal, but it’s easier than figuring out a real relationship in person. Case in point, my cousin Vicky and Anthony’s marriage is still all over the place. Any little thing Anthony does that she perceives as wrong, she throws a tantrum that lasts days or even weeks. Uncle Chuck believes Anthony is almost done with “all of the bologna,” as he calls it, mainly because the last fight they got into had something to do with cabbage. My uncle said she stayed in her room for three days over that one.
That’s too much drama for me. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t get upset with Alec if he accidentally bought cabbage instead of a head of lettuce. I think I’d just ask him nicely if he’d run back out and get the right stuff, or better yet, I’d go get it. Not a big deal in the scheme of things, am I right?
In anticipation of his return, I’ve been helping Alec look for a place to live. We’ve got a system one that isn’t working all that well, if I’m being frank. It works like this, Alec will find a listing of something he likes, I’ll call and set up an appointment, and then he’ll view it with FaceChat when I see it, or I’ll record it if he’s unavailable. It’s kind of fun, but I’ve found Alec to be sort of picky when it comes to choosing a new home. First he wants two bedrooms; then he wants three or at least one with an office space. Alec believes a large kitchen is mandatory, along with two bathrooms that do not need updating, but the most important thing? A garage for two vehicles and a place for a workshop.
I’m not sure what he wants to build in that space, and I’m pretty sure he isn’t sure either, but it is what it is. I just don’t think he’s going to find all that in a rental property, but what do I know? I’ve shown him some pretty great places. I don’t get why he hasn’t chosen one yet. Is he looking for a place for both of us? The reason I bring it up is because he’s always asking, “Do you like it, Matilda? Could you picture yourself living there?” I know that’s sort of a big hint, but he hasn’t come right out and asked me to live with him, and frankly, I’m not sure I would. Not right away. We haven’t even had sex yet, how could I move in with him without knowing him, you know, in the biblical sense? So, when he asks me, I usually mumble something and shrug.
And then there’s Stella, my new pup, the one donated to me. She’s doing awesome, but because it’s winter in Chicago, she stays in a kennel in the basement most days. I won’t leave her in the cold, even though they say they’re fine if they’ve got a good doghouse, which she does. It’s me. I worry.
My dad doesn’t mind that she’s downstairs, and there’s room enough in the basement to do some of this initial training because she’s so little right now. Eventually, she’ll be an eighty-pound dog, for sure. But, by then, it’ll be warmer outside, and we can train in the yard. Moving to an apartment would mean I would have to be at both places every day, so it’d need to be close to my dad’s place, and most of the apartments that Alec wants are downtown. Then, there’s the cost. I’d want to pay half the rent if I lived with him, and the ones he prefers are pretty pricey. I guess it’s something we could talk about if he ever asked me to live with him. But he hasn’t, so there’s no need to get all worried about it, right?
I’m right, and besides, my focus is on Christmas, which is right around the corner. While Halloween is my favorite holiday, Christmas is right up there. It was my mom’s favorite. She always went all out with the decorations and gifts. She started shopping for gifts for the next Christmas on December 26th. No joke. Part of it was because the sales, but the other part was she just loved finding the perfect gift for the people she loved, and that took all year to do that.
I don’t go that far. I’m too disorganized to shop like that. Plus, I’m broke most of the time. But I do love giving people gifts that they will love or that surprises them. Example, this year I bought my dad a digital subscription to the world’s most difficult crossword puzzles. Some of them are in other languages, which mean it’ll take him a lot longer to figure those out. He’ll have to use his tablet instead of a pen, but regular crossword puzzles are way too easy for the man.
The person I’m having trouble with is Alec. I have no idea what to get him. I’ve never had a boyfriend during the holidays, or ever, so this is all new to me. Kimmy suggested a sweater, which would be fine, but that’s kind of impersonal. Jewelry is out of the question because he’s not a jewelry kind of man. He wears a watch, but it looked like it was in pretty good shape when I saw him in November. It’s kinda driving me nuts. I want it to be right—to be perfect.
“Ooh, I know what you should give him for Christmas?” Kimmy is curled up on our sofa with me as I work through this problem.
“What?”
“A surprise trip to Texas.”
“Oh, I don’t know.”
“Why not? He can’t come home, so you go there.”
We stare at each other for a second. At that moment, my dad walks into the room. “That’s a good idea, Muffin. Catch a flight down there on the morning of Christmas Eve. You’re off work until the day after Christmas.”
“Aren’t you gonna miss me on Christmas morning?”
