Do I realize how crazy it is to talk to my cat?
Yes.
Do I care?
No, because Barney is a great listener.
“Well, Spencer was being Spencer. Remember I told you I made up the fake boyfriend?” I snort. “Well, today I had to come through with one, so I grabbed the first guy I could find and paid him twenty bucks to pretend to be my boyfriend. And boy, did I ever pick well, Barney. Honest to goodness, I thought I had no luck whatsoever. I mean, have I ever won anything in all the time you’ve known me?” I don’t bother waiting for him to answer. “No. I have not. I guess I was saving up all my luck for today because the guy I asked to help me was d-r-e-a-m-y and s-e-x-y all rolled into one big, tall package.” Sighing, I notice Barney’s done with his dinner. He’s licking his paws so he can wipe off his face with them. Gah, aren’t cats geniuses?
Picking him up, I walk into my small living room and plop down onto my sofa–one that used to belong to my parents. I inherited it when mom moved to Arizona. “So, as I said, he was very good-looking, but not only that, he wasnice. I mean, what guy would agree to bemyfake boyfriend just to get a creepy guy off their back?” I pet Barney’s head as he settles into my lap. It’s snuggle time.
“I can’t think of a single person who would do it, buthedid. The sad thing is, Barney-poo? I’m never going to see that guy again. It was a one-time thing.” Leaning back, I sigh again. “It’s okay, I’ll just fantasize about him instead. It’ll be Hudson’s face I see all the time when reading my romance books. That’ll be enough.” That’s a lie. “Probably for the best because there is no way anything will come of it becausethatguy is perfect. And I thought nobody was perfect, Barney. Not even you.”
Barney makes a fussy sound. See? I know he understands me. We’ve cohabitated for going on nine years. Of course he gets me. We’ve been through everything together. And I meaneverything. The good, the bad, theverybad, and the ugly.
“You know that twenty dollars I gave him to help me?” Barney doesn’t answer but I’m sure he remembers. “He ended up buying me a beer and pretzel with my twenty dollars, which was nice of him.” It also gives me a thought. “Everything is so dang expensive at those ballgames. Ten bucks for a beer? Eight dollars for a pretzel? Geesh. That’s highway robbery.”
“Anyway, as we were leaving, Barbara and Mr. McAllister stopped to talk to him. Apparently, they know him. I’m sure Mr. McAllister and Bitchy Barb know lots of people.” That’s right, I said “Bitchy Barb.” I’m not the only one who calls her that, either. Bonnie told me it was the name people used behind her back.
She’s not a nice person, and I experienced that firsthand, today. “Settling.” I say it out loud. I know she was insulting me. I’m not dumb. On the contrary, I consider myself quite intelligent. You should be on my team on trivia night. You won’t be sorry. It doesn’t mean it didn’t sting.
Luckily, Barbara doesn’t work at the firm, but she does stop by frequently. I’ve heard she gives Sheila a hard time. She’s rude, plus she assigns her extra things to do for her like pick up her laundry or make her hair and nail appointments. That’s not Sheila’s job. She’s Mac’s executive assistant, not Barb’s. I’d growl just thinking about how unfair it is, except there’s nothing I can do. It is what it is.
“So, his name was Hudson. I think they said his last name was Adler.” I pet my favorite yellow fella. “I wonder if he’s a cat person.”
Shaking my head, I roll my eyes at myself. “Not that it matters. It’s not like I’m ever going to see him again. Right, Barney?”
He doesn’t reply, but that’s okay. I know he agrees. Barney always agrees with me.
* * *
The phone ringsat my desk. Pressing the speaker button, I say what I always say, “McAllister Accounting, this is Willa Clariday. How may I help you?”
“Willa? This is Sheila.”
“Oh, hey. What’s up? Want to go to lunch?”
It’s the Monday after our Saturday at the ballpark. I overslept this morning mostly because I couldn’t put my new book down last night and ended up reading past one. Oversleeping means I didn’t have time to shower. Also, I’m dressed in old leggings and a tunic that used to be a dress, but it’s too short now due to the fact it’s also very tight. I didn’t have time to pack my lunch of peanut butter and jelly sandwich either. I’m going to have to splurge on lunch out today, which I hate, since I’ve got a strict monthly budget that doesn’t have room in it for lunching out. Unfortunately, it can’t be helped.
“Mr. McAllister would like to see you in his office.”
“Huh?” Crap. Did I do something wrong? Surely Spencer would have told me if I had. He’s good at that, you know, pointing out my flaws and mistakes. But since he doesn’t appear to be speaking to me today…
I doubt it’s that, but I may as well ask. “Did I do something wrong?”
“I can’t say.” She pauses, then whispers into the phone, “But I don’t think so.”
“Okay.” I feel sweat start to accumulate on my brow. “When does he want to see me?”
“Now.”
So soon?“I’ll be there in a second.”
Glancing down at myself, I cringe. “Of course I’d oversleep on the one day my boss wants to meet…” I look disheveled, to say the least.
Putting my computer to sleep, I grab my purse and am about to head to the elevators when a tall shadow appears at my door. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“Mr. McAllister wants to see me.” I pause. “Then, I’m going to lunch.”
