“Wide awake.”
Kissing his neck, I let my hands feel him. His skin is warm and smooth except over his chest, with a little nest of hair between his pectorals. I kiss him there and everywhere. “I’m the luckiest woman in the world.”
“True.” He laughs at his own statement.
I laugh right along with him. We do that a lot. Laugh. In bed and out of it. We’ve got an easy thing about us but don’t misunderstand. That easy thing took a lot of work.
“You gonna take over?” I ask as I slide my hand beneath the band of his boxers. Wrapping my hand around him, I slide it down to the base of him, then back up.
“Nah.” He brings his arms up over his head and rests them there. “I like what you’re doing.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Hey….” I stop stroking him. “You never answered me.”
“About what?
“Did you ever go to Stanford?”
Chase chuckles. “Yes. I went to Stanford. I only went a semester, then enlisted.”
“Oh.” Phew. I’m glad I finally got that question answered. “Okay. One more… Why won’t you ever go back to Chicago?”
“Long story.” He grunts as I feel him harden. “Yeah. Keep doing that.”
I stop moving. “Tell me.”
His eyes meet mine. I can see the wheels turning. “My biological father lives there. When I finally found out who he was, I was sixteen. I jumped on a Greyhound and rode out from California in search of him. When he opened his front door, I couldn’t believe my eyes. We looked exactly alike. Anyone seeing us together would have known we were related at the very least.”
My hand is still in his shorts, but I’m mesmerized by his story. I can tell by his voice this is hard for him.
“When I introduced myself, told him who my mother was and that he was my biological father, do you know what he did?”
I’m afraid to answer. “No.”
“He told me he had no idea who the fuck I was talking about and slammed the door in my face.”
“Chase….”
“The thing is, when I found his house, I didn’t go up the steps right away. I sat across the street on someone else’s stoop just to observe him. It was December. I froze my ass off.”
He’s quiet for several seconds. “He had another family. A wife, a son, and a daughter. The son was about my age, maybe a little older, the girl, a few years younger.”
“Oh, Chase.” I pull my hand out of his shorts and place it over his heart. It’s beating hard.
“I guess I like to torture myself because I know who they are. I know what they do for a living. I mean, they’re my half siblings after all.”
I lean in as close as I can, whispering, “Do they know about you?”
“No idea.”
Chase rubs his hands over his face. I wish I could tell you exactly what he’s thinking but I can’t. He’s got a way of shielding his feelings like he’s wearing a mask. “Have you ever wanted to meet them?”
“No.”
“Maybe you should. Is your father still around?”
