Chapter Thirty-One
Ben
Walkingout of the office Monday night, I’m stopped by a number of my colleagues. Some of them just want to see Sky. Word got around pretty quickly that I had my dog there and the reason for her visit. That earned her some really kind words and gentle head pats. She ate that shit up.
An even larger number of people had something to say about my email—most of it good. A couple people, like Brendan, thought it was ridiculous that I felt the need to bother with that kind of thing, muttering, “Bullshit” and “Career suicide.” He’s probably right, but my conscience wouldn’t let me go on with my life without taking responsibility. That notion was reinforced by most of the other comments. People patted me on the back and said things like “Well done,” and “Way to show leadership.”
Leadership? I’m not sure I’d call it that, but I’m not about to argue.
Just as I’m about to press the Down button for the elevator, I feel a tap on my shoulder. Turning my head, I see Lindsay. “Oh, hey.”
Her voice is soft and sort of broken up. “Thank you, Ben.”
“No need to thank me, Lindsay. I should have done this a long time ago.”
“Yeah.” she laughs a little. “You should have.”
“I wish you’d told me.”
The laugh is gone. “I did.”
“You did? When?”
“The day you got the standing O for the idea. You were walking out of the conference room and I tried, but you were getting back slaps and handshakes. You weren’t listening to me.”
“I-I’m sorry.” Shit. “I’m really sorry.”
Lindsay shakes her head quickly. “No. I know. I mean it. Thank you.” As she’s about to turn, she stops. “I just need for you to understand this from my perspective.”
I set Sky’s crate down so I can give Lindsay my full attention. “Okay.”
“As a woman in a corporate setting, it’s a difficult balance.”
I nod because I think I know what she means, but I want her to say it just so I’m sure.
“If we—women—speak up too much, we’re labeled overbearing or bossy. Women who stand up for themselves at work are described as being shrill, ballbusters, and nasty. So for a year I’ve stewed about what you did, and the more I let it continue, the more it festered. I know I didn’t behave in the most professional way, but it was the only thing I could think of to do to bring it to Graham’s attention.”
“Why did you turn Clive against me?” I really want to know.
“I didn’t. Not intentionally. He and I became friends. We ate lunch together a few times a week, and he was my sounding board. I did the same for him. You weren’t always the best boss.”
“Yeah. I can see that now.”
I have to ask, “Did you feed the bad data to Clive?”
Her face flushes. “I did.”
“Why?”
She rolls her eyes. “I knew you were hoping for a promotion, but I couldn’t let that happen. Not after the rebranding.”
“Doing that makes you no better than me.”
“I know.” She’s no longer looking at me. “You should have double-checked the numbers, though.”
“I trusted Clive. He was always spot-on with that kind of thing.”
“I should apologize to him about that.”
