“You wanted to keep me in the past.”
“I did, even though I hated it, even thought I was so tempted…”
“Tempted?”
Thomas opened his eyes. “To book you, Scott, not for anything sexual, but just to…reminisce. Those three years were mundane, and not worth remembering, but you were. You are.” He smiled. “In four months, I forgot what your hideous laugh sounds like.”
“My laugh is not hideous.”
“I forgot what you look like when you let your walls come down, when you’re not Scott the escort, but just Scott,myScott who draws and eats beside me. Who cried when I sang and who I had to hold back from licking the walls while off his face on mushrooms. It was impossible for you to keep that mask you wear on in our cell.”
Scott frowned. “I could’ve kept it up, but there was no need for it. You didn’t judge me for not looking preened and perfect all the time. You preferred me like that, unwaxed, with knots in my hair, smelling of cheap deodorant and sweat.”
Thomas hummed like he loved the imagery Scott was conjuring.
“Weird,” Scott muttered.
“Real,” Thomas countered. “I froze when I saw you by the fountain that day. Everything about you was too controlled, too…scripted, from your clothes to your hair, to the smell youleft in your wake. The smile on your face reached your eyes, but your eyes themselves were cold. Even the way you walked was pretentious, then you let it all go, and I saw my Scott, my exhausted Scott, you only showed him for a few seconds, then he disappeared, the veneered Scott came back and screamed at the sight of me. I thought we got passed that on month one.”
“I didn’t scream at thesightof you. I didn’t know anyone else was there. You were so damn silent, and I wasn’t expecting it.”
“I saw how you were with Anthony.” Thomas tensed. “I didn’t like it.”
“It’s a job.”
“I know, but you’re notyou. And I like you.”
“Well, you’re one, if not the only, person who has seen me, warts and all.”
Thomas chuckled. “Yeah, I remember you freaking out over the pimple on your arse.”
“Hey,” Scott snapped with no heat. “It was traumatic. I thought it was a tic.”
“You need an animal with fur to bring that into the prison.”
“Excuse me, but did you see some of our neighbours?” Scott shook his head. “Keanu in cell eighty-two had fleas. His whole back looked like it was moving.”
They both shuddered.
Thomas pushed the bowl in front of him away and twisted in his chair to fully face Scott. “When I walked in that room, and saw that man on top of you like that…” He took a deep breath. “I kept an eye on you inside Brixton, you know that right?”
“I know,” Scott said softly. “You hissed at anyone who looked at me for too long in the showers.”
“And outside of them too. I wanted to run Warren through, but he was threatening to cut you. I felt helpless, like I might have to do what he asked, give him my keys, lead him out, watchhim drive away with you… It was unimaginable, but I couldn’t see any other choice except for you to be cut up in front of me.”
Scott squeezed Thomas’s hand. “You threw the keys like I told you to.”
“I did.”
“Penelope took care of the rest, and you let John loose to finish the job, and cleaned up afterwards.”
Thomas nodded stiffly.
“I’m safe, Thomas.”
“I know…but what about next time?”
Scott scrunched his brow. “What do you mean?”
