“He won’t…accidentally tell anyone though, right?”
Warren sat down on the bed and stared at his feet. “No, that side of his thought process isn’t messed up. He knows right from wrong, andhe knows that this has to be kept between us. Con can’t control his impulses and has outbursts.
“He’ll feel guilty for making us both feel bad. We’ve lived with the secrecy for a long time. It gets hard at times, pretending, putting on a show with women, but…”
“So you’re like fully…?”
“Gay?” he raised a brow.
“Well yeah, but. You could be bi, you know?”
He smiled sadly. “I don’t mind women, been with plenty, but they’re not Con, he’s it for me. We fought it for a long time. It was only after you were gone we realized it was more than physical.”
“You love him?” I whisper.
“Of course I do,” he said without hesitation. There was genuine emotion behind his words.
“Oh Warren,” I grabbed his hand and squeezed tight.
“Sometimes I wish,” he looked over at the window. “I wish I’d been brave enough to leave with you,” he breathed.
“I wish you had too,” I said, laying my head on his shoulder.
I hate seeing my brother in so much pain. He came across so strong and alpha male, but that isn’t who he is. It didn’t matter how much they wanted it, nothing short of leaving the MC would allow them to be together.
Warren would never do that. He was too loyal to our father and the club. He had chosen it over me. My heart hurt all over again for Connor. He could no longer be an active member in the MC. Riding his bike was taken from him. His mind wasn’t his own anymore and the person he was in love with had to deny him.
“Is there anything I can do?” I asked, but it felt like an empty gesture.
“You being here is enough, even if it is only for a little while. Knowing you don’t hate us helps. But fuck Waverley, from now on, knock on the damn door.”
“Oh believe me, I will!” I laughed. “And I don’t hate you. How could I when I know you love each other… He loves you back, right? I mean, you are annoying.” That at least got a laugh out of him. “Does anyone know?”
“Hud, we didn’t want to lie to him. He covers for us.” I raised my brows. “Don’t think badly about him, Wave. He might be an asshole,but he would do anything to keep us safe. All of us,” he adds pointedly. “God, this is a mess, huh?”
“Love often is.”
Warren looked at me. “If it’s any consolation, Hud was wrecked after you were gone.”
“Don’t,” I told him. “I don’t care about that. It’s water under the bridge. I have someone else, and I’m happy now.”
“Are you though? Happy?”
“Of course I am.”
My brother stared into my eyes. “You love him?” He echoed my earlier question to him. I was the first to blink and look away. “It’s okay,” he said. “I could see you really like him. But if you’ve been together that long and still don’t feel it… Just saying. Sometimes we can’t control who we give our hearts to.”
“Who are you, and what have you done with my brother?” I asked, only joking a little. This did not sound like my brother. But thinking back on it, he had never had any problems with the relationships that happened around the MC.
Connor had been fine with my blossoming relationship with Hudson. Warren hadn’t taken it well when he found out we’d been sneaking around behind his back.
Of course he punched Hudson a few times, gave him the whole he’d kill him if he hurt me story, then he let it go, as long as we didn’t get overly affectionate in front of him. He never tried to force us apart.
“I guess some of that emotional sappy shit you and Con were always spewing rubbed off on me.”
A knock at the door startled us. I got up to find Hudson in the doorway. He looked past me to Warren. “I just saw Connor. He told me to come speak to you. What happened?” Hudson looked at me suspiciously, then back to Warren, who had dropped his head into his hands.
“Wave knows,” he told Hudson.
