Despite the angry demand, I understood, so I folded my arms and watched the numbers lighting up as the elevator descended. We hurried out on the ground floor and I looked all around, panic rising up in me that I may not find my brother. Fortunately, Warren stood out like a sore thumb amongst the normal people, and I spotted him heading for the exit. I rushed after him, Hudson at my side. Warren noticed us and put his hand over his eyes in exasperation.
“Can’t you just leave me be?”
“No,” I said and gave Hudson a look.
He patted the air with both hands letting us know he’d back off but he gave Warren a look, which my brother returned. They may be pissed at each other right now but they both wanted to protect me. Warren grabbed my hand, and we left through the automatic doors. I didn’t look back at Hudson. He would follow us, but he would keep his distance.
Warren didn’t say anything as we walked. I had no idea where we were going until we headed towards a bench that was away from the main footfall of the hospital. He didn’t sit, until I pushed his big ass, and he dropped down.
“That only worked because you caught me off guard,” he said, looking up at me.
“Shut up, idiot,” I sat beside him, leaning forward so I could look at him. “What’s going on?”
“You of all people should know what’s going on.”
“Cut the bullshit. What is going on here, up there?” I waved a hand at the hospital. “You don’t want to see him?”
He looked away into the distance and I got the feeling he needed time to figure out what to say. It was Warren’s way. Where Hudson lashed out when he was angry, Warren always got silent. He didn’t talk about his feelings much. Except with me, when I threatened him usually, but this wasn’t the time to go all hard ass on him. Something was seriously wrong.
“No, I won’t go in to see him,” he finally spoke, his voice low. He still didn’t look at me.
“Why?” I asked softly.
“Because…” he cleared his throat and looked down at the floor. “He doesn’t want to see me.”
My mouth dropped open. That was not what I expected him to say. “I don’t understand.”
“What’s not to understand?” Warren looked at me, he laughed depreciatively. “He said he didn’t want to see me. He even told the nurses not to let me in. That’s why I didn’t hang around when you were talking to Rosa.”
“But, I thought… Hudson said you have been in to see him.”
“The first time we came, yeah. He was still unconscious, and I was fucked up, seeing him like that. Again. I just stood there, looking at him, not knowing if he was going to wake up.”
I reached over and put my hand on his knee. He inhaled heavily. “Have you spoken to him at all?”
“When he told me to get the fuck out, yeah,” he looked up at me. His lower eyelids were red, there were dark shadows beneath them. “I came back here the other night, told Hud I was at his apartment, but I came here, to see him. Once I knew he was awake, I wanted to be here.”
“What happened?”
“He was asleep, so I sat with him, stayed there watching him for hours. Then he woke up, saw me and asked why I was there,” he shook his head as if reliving the moment and still not being able to understand it. “I told him I was there because he was hurt and he needed me. He said he didn’t need me. He said there was nothing I could do for him and I should leave. I thought he was joking, like he always fucking does,” he lifted his head again and looked at me. “He wasn’t joking.”
“But, that doesn’t seem right, he loves you, why would he do that?”
“You tell me,” he said, his voice rising slightly. “Tell me why the man I love and would do anything for kicked me out of his room and told the people taking care of him not to let me back in, like I was someone he needed to be afraid of. Cos I don’t fucking get it either.”
“You didn’t try to talk to him, find out why?”
“No Wave, I just walked away,” he spat sarcastically. “Of course I did. I asked why and he just got agitated and the nurses made me leave anyway.”
“He’s scared, I mean he didn’t seem himself when I was in there either, making jokes. He was…off somehow.”
“Yeah well, that’s more than I got.” He stood up and my hand dropped down on the bench where he had been sitting. He paced back and forth then stopped with his back to me, his hands on his hips and his shoulders rose and fell.
“He’s suffered another traumatic attack,” I rationalized. “He just needs time.”
“Time?” he whirled on me. “He’s spent the last few days seeing everyone butme. Me,” he slammed a hand against his chest. “I’ve known him a long time, I know when he is serious about something. I don’t think it’s just that he doesn’t want to see me now, I think it’s more than that.”
“I don’t believe that, and you can’t either. Connor would never do that.”
