“You spent a lot of time hiding shit.” Again he reads my expression, and I don’t particularly like his words. “The whole shit show with Nytro, and Ranger almost being killed to get him out of the way. We all know what went down with the Kingsmen. You were trying not to give awaywhat you felt about how they were running the club into the ground. You were loyal, and that is admirable but it has made it hard for you to get out of that state of mind.”
“I’ll never be like you,” I mutter.
“No one is like me,” he winks. “Now go in there and fix your shit.”
“Is she likely to get her job back?” I ask quietly.
“Like I said, I’m not sure she wants it, but she would have liked to leave on her terms.”
“Women. I don’t fucking understand them.”
“You don’t need to understand her, you need to appreciate her for who she is and recognize that people view the world differently, that doesn’t mean we have to butt heads.”
“That’s enough of this shit,” I grunt and walk away to the sound of him laughing.
This is weird as shit. A few weeks ago, I couldn’t stand to be around him. Now we’re giving each other advice about women… And practically having my dick in his mouth. Nope, not going there.
At the time, I didn’t question it but it’s not something to go any further. We can share her, but there will be nothing between him and me.
There is music playing when I enter the house. Cassie is sitting on the couch with her legs drawn up and a laptop balancing on her knees. She is so focused on it she doesn’t hear me come in, only looking up when I walk into her line of sight. Her face is unreadable.
It takes me a moment to figure out what to say.
“I fucked up.”
She tilts her head and a little line appears between her brows.
“I should apologize, and I am sorry about your job and how that went down. The thing with Roderick, I can’t be sorry about that. I regret being so heavy-handed but I’ve let someone get hurt before by not being there.”
I wasn’t expecting those words to come out of my mouth. Just looking at her makes me want to spill the truth.
“You mean Waverley?”
“She nearly died. And that was on me. So yeah, I had that in my head when I heard him shouting and then throwing that glass. It’s messed up, but it’s the way I am.”
“It’s not messed up.” She sets the laptop aside. “Circumstances were different, with different repercussions for me. No one was going to die.”
She’s right. “It’s the way I think. I always see the danger, the what if.” I take a step back and sit down, towering over her can be seen as intimidating. I don’t want her to think I’m trying to control her or force my opinion on her. Handlebar is right about that. Her posture shifts when I sit.
“You saved Waverley’s life, you got shot for it.”
Her eyes dip to my abdomen. She’s seen the scar, the amount of times she’s seen me naked. She’s made no comment about it. A loud sigh escapes her, and she drops her legs.
“Truth is, I’ve been looking for a way out. I was scared to take the leap. And a lot of it did have to do with this case. I’ve always been able to choose what I worked on, but I was forced into this because I’m a woman, and they wanted to show the judge, any potential jury and the world that he had a female supporting him.”
“That’s why you did what you did, getting her a better lawyer.”
Cassie nods but doesn’t elaborate. Fair enough. “I don’t like the way it happened. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about it and it isn’t just what you did. It’s what they did. Harry didn’t have a second thought about it. Hefiredme, told me to get out. I’ve worked with him for years and he didn’t even blink. Maybe, it was the wake up call I needed.”
“Are you trying to make me feel better?”
“Not a chance, that’s your job. I might be listening to you right now but I’m still mad.”
I nod, that’s understandable.
“At least I understand it better,” she says, looking directly into my eyes.
Her meaning is clear, she gets why I’m the way I am. I wish I could change it. Both of them are right, I’m stuck in the past, blaming myself for everything that went wrong, with my old club, with Ranger the Prez I respected, even with Zelda. I haven’t talked to Ranger in over a year. He was there for me through everything, even when I turned traitor on them, he warned me.
