That endearment brought me out. I swallowed past the lump and licked my dry lips.
"Wha-what did you say?" I croaked, hoping I had misheard him.
Another glance to the left and right. "Ahh...what part did you miss?"
"All of it." My tone was hard, and I slid my hand out of his.
Brian blinked before leaning back in his chair. "I'm not ready for a relationship after losing my wife. But I am lonely. I was wondering if you would be open to having a purely sexual relationship?"
That ice-cold water tipped over. My hopes and silly romantic notions sizzled and smoked around me.
Tears pricked behind my eyes, and the elation I’d been feeling all night—and since I'd met Brian—sunk like a lead balloon. The shock of such dizzying emotional highs and lows had me shell-shocked.
"You're a beautiful and sensuous woman, Maria," Brian continued.
Beautiful and sensuous? I would've preened under the compliment if he’d said that to me at the start of the night. Now? I knew what he really meant was:"You're hot and look like a slut."
I looked around at all the beautifully made-up women whose partners were gazing at them like they were the center of their universe. I was kidding myself to think I could be one of them.
Idiot. I was such an idiot.
I swallowed hard and glanced down at my half-drunk glass of wine. My hands itched to throw their contents into his stupid, handsome face.
Instead, I grabbed the white linen napkin placed on my lap with a flourish by the smartly dressed waiter, and lightly dabbed my lips before placing it on top of my half-eaten lobster tail.
With a calm I was far from feeling, I grabbed my purse, pushed my chair back, and stood before strolling purposefully towards the exit.
With my head held high.
I ignored Brian's panicked shout of my name, which caused a few patrons to peer curiously our way.
I nodded politely at the maître d' whose eyes shifted behind me, probably to ensure I wasn't doing a runner. I handed him my coat check ticket and waited patiently while he hastily produced my black coat.
By this stage, Brian had caught up with me.
"Maria, sweetheart," he murmured in a low tone as he took my elbow.
He was probably concerned about making a scene. Not wanting to be barred in case he wanted to bring his next "beautiful and sensuous" woman here for a date.
I shifted my elbow away from him and continued towards the double doors. I produced another polite nod at the doorman before stepping out into the cool night air.
I welcomed the temperature change. It helped cool my boiling blood.
"Maria, sweetheart, please talk to me. I didn't mean –"
I jerked away from him and made a beeline towards a group of storefronts. I would call a car back to New Haven from there.
I heard Brian's hurried steps behind me, but I ignored him.
I was done.
Done being the fallback plan. Done being the piece of ass that was only good enough to fuck but not to take out to dinner. Done chasing after men who weren't emotionally mature or emotionally available. Done having my time wasted by men whoonly saw me as someone to amuse themselves with until their fucking soul mate turned up.
Done.
Ever since I was fourteen, my body had been used for men's pleasure.
No more. I was done.
