He shook his head and pulled away. I instantly missed his warmth. He picked up the letter that he'd placed on the table and stared down at the words. Lines of strain were written around his mouth. "Remember when I told you that Hannah had left me a letter that Sarah kept from me?"
I nodded, eyeing the document. Was that the letter?
His mouth tightened, and that flash of anger appeared again. I didn't need a reason to be pissed at Sarah, but if I hadn't known her from Eve, I would really despise the bitch right now for the unnecessary hurt she put Brian through.
"There were two letters."
My brow pulled down. "Huh?"
Briefly, he explained what happened. How he went over to Diane's to get answers about the past, and coincidentally, the letters were brought up. Hannah had written him one final letter to be given to him six months after her funeral. And Sarah had kept it from him. Just when I thought she couldn't be more evil, she did something that affected not only Brian but her sister as well. Her sister's final wishes were ignored. And for what? Soshe could keep everyone wallowing in misery with her, unable to deal with their grief in a healthy way? Unable to form healthy relationships?
I stepped back when Brian's hand extended out to me. With the letter.
"Brian…"
His eyes were soft as he glanced down at the letter and back at me. "I want you to read it," he said.
With a shaky hand, I reached out to take it from him. I didn't bother asking if he was sure. Brian was handing me a gift. A gift from his late wife. One he wanted to share with me, and I'd be a fool to turn him down.
I barely read the first line before I felt the sting of tears press against the back of my eyes. Her words were so beautifully sad. I could feel them come alive from the page, touching a dark part of my soul with a light that could only come from the spirit of someone so beautiful and generous. By the end, I was crying so much that I had to hold the paper away from me so that my tears didn't stain such a precious document.
Hannah was a better person than all of us combined. She was more than kind. She had a huge heart, and even in death, she thought of others. I wiped my tears away as I handed the letter back to Brian.
"Thank you for sharing that with me. It sounds like she was a beautiful person, inside and out."
He gently folded the letter before placing it back on the bench. He cupped my cheek, rubbing the wetness away. "She was. I'm eternally grateful to have been her husband. And I'm even more grateful that she brought you to me."
I gave him a wan smile. "Brian, I don't think I'm what Hannah would've envisioned you with. I'm sure she heard all about the slut who hooked up with her sister's boyfriend."
My eyes narrowed on Brian's face. It was only a small tell—a shift of his eyes to the side—but I knew an evasive look when I saw one. "What?"
"Huh?"
"You made a face." I poked his side.
He grimaced, rubbing the back of his neck. "When all that shit with Sarah and her boyfriend went down, Hannah and I were together. I…I was with her when she got the call from Sarah. I heard everything –"
I stepped back from him, horror seeping into my lungs. "Oh, my god!" I covered my face, unable to contain the mortification. Sarah had been pissed—rightly so—-so I could just imagine what names she'd called me on the phone to her sister. And for Brian to have been there…
"This is so embarrassing! I can't - wait, are youlaughing?"
Brian shook his head and waved his hands, his mouth pinched as he attempted to hold in his amusement. "Sorry, it's just only hit me now. I was so pissed off at you on Sarah's behalf. Who knewthatgirl would turn out to be the love of my life?"
My eyes widened at his words and swallowed down a lump. "Someone up there has a dark sense of humor," I whispered.
All traces of amusement vanished when he spied my ashen face. He stalked forward a step and cupped my cheek before bending to cover my lips with his. My body was pliant, my arms loosely at my sides as Brian ravaged my mouth. His hands tightened around my head, and my mouth opened helplessly beneath his. It had only been a few hours ago that we were making out like a bunch of teenagers on his couch before my past caught up with me. I couldn't envision that this would be the outcome.
He ended the kiss just as my hands grabbed his waist. His nose rubbed against mine, and his lips touched my forehead. His sigh fluttered over me.
"You don't love me yet."
I tensed and went to jerk back from him, but he held me tight. "I don't expect you to after how I'd treated you over the last few months." He drew back from me, his smile soft. I could see a small light of disappointment behind his eyes, but he still held me against him. His fingers stroked gently over my cheek, pushing back thick strands of my hair behind my ear.
"I am falling for you. I am," I insisted.
Did I love Brian? I was heading that way fast. I knew a part of me held back…just in case. Just in case he had a flash of guilt and pulled away. Just in case he got bored of small-town living and decided to up sticks and end things. Just in case he realized my emotional baggage was too much to handle, and after losing his wife he just wanted…easy. No stress. No one who'd slept with half the single guys in town.
"I know." Still, his smile didn't reach his eyes. "But I also know that you don't need me. I've slotted myself into your life, hoping you'll realize I'm indispensable to you. You're it for me, Maria. All your perfects, your flaws, your desires, your dreams…I want them all."
