She paused and peered at me. Instead of denying it and reassuring me that she was fine like I assumed she would, she instead gave me a weary smile. "I have something to tell you."
I felt my heart drop. "Oh, god."
My mom frowned. "Don't take the Lord's name in vain," she chastised.
"Sorry. Mom, what's wrong?"
She gave a deep sigh, one full of tiredness and sorrow. Her eyes crinkled as she gave me a conciliatory smile. "You know your Aunt Pano wants me to move in with her."
My stomach dropped. Even though I was anticipating this conversation, my breathing became shallow as a sense of panic started to set in. "Yeah," I slowly prompted.
She gestured around her. "The house. It's too much for me."
"So we'll sell." I leaned towards her, my eyes pleading. "You can move in with me or stay here, and I'll move back in."
"Leai." Mom sharply shot that down. "You have a life to live. You're seeing that sweet boy." She gave me a narrowed glance. "You are still seeing Simon?"
"Yes, we're still together, Mom. But -"
"It's time," she softly said. "Ua ou misia lo'u aiga." I miss my family.
"I'm your family." My voice broke.
"You're my life, Sofia. But I'm so lonely without your father."
The dam broke at her words, and tears streamed down my face. "I'll move back in," I babbled, frantically wiping the wetness from my face.
"You have a life to look forward to, my darling. Maybe with Simon? Maybe with someone else. But I can see you are close to settling down. The house is too big and..." she sighed, her eyes red from her own grief. "I am tired."
I nodded miserably, even though I understood. "You're moving to Trenton."
"Ioe." Yes.
I nodded again, feeling numb. It wasn't like Trenton was Timbucktoo, but it had been mom and me for so long. I never thought she would leave New Haven, and I was mourning an end of an era.
She seemed to sense my thoughts. "This will always be my home. As long as God is willing, I will keep coming back to visit. But I need to be near my family. All of our relatives live there. I miss being part of a big family."
With a few more tears shed between us, we talked about our happy memories in the house. The garden mom planted and the beans I would shuck from it. The tree where I broke my arm and where dad carved the date it happened on its trunk. The more we chatted, the more I realized my mom was right. It was time to move on, to let another family make new memories here.
As I waited for the lift at my apartment, my phone rang.
"Hey." My voice croaked a little. I may have cried a little in the car.
"What's wrong?" Simon sharply asked. He was so in tune with my moods; it was a little scary.
"Mom's moving to Trenton," I sniffed.
"Ahh, baby." I talked to Simon at great length that I suspected mom was gearing up to move soon. He knew it was my greatest fear.
"I understand," I said as I walked into the lift and punched the number to my floor. "She's getting older; she misses the extended family. It just...sucks."
I stepped off the lift and ambled to my door at the end of the hall. "Everything's changing, Si. E and Barr are getting hitched, and I know she wants to move more rural eventually. Ry's moving to Philly. I know these places are easy to get to, but I just feel so alone."
"Baby. You're not alone. Not even for a second. You still have your mom; you still have your friends. And you have me. I'm not going anywhere."
A cloud of love floated over my head, and I felt infinitely better just hearing his voice. Outwardly, I sniffed and made a noncommittal sound, but I really wanted to say that I loved him and wished I could feel his arms around me.
"Fuck. My client's arrived." Simon was working a rare Sunday. He had an important longtime client request an in-person meeting and was only free today. "Is there anything I can do for you, baby?"
