I laughed despite the tears streaming down my cheeks.“Well…that’s not too far from the truth.”
When she dipped her chin and sent me a look that saidwhat the hell are you talking about, I dove into the truth.All of it.The hookup four years ago when I had discovered Preston cheating, the white-hot night in the penthouse hotel room, the way he’d discovered my lie the next morning and I’d gone on to watch him give a presentation while burning with humiliation—and sick from my unexpected pregnancy with Mia.I told her about running into him in April, the way he’d saved me, the immediate sparks.The way he’d shown up at my former job…and asked me to marry him so he could get an inheritance.
By the end of my story, her jaw was on the floor.
“So you married him for money,” she said, sounding distant.
“I mean, yes.Technically.But I failed to uphold my end of the deal, and he lost the inheritance.So now we’re done.”
Zoey was quiet for a long moment, processing.“Okay, can I be honest?This actually makes perfect sense.”
“How?”
She looked at me with narrowed eyes, waggling her finger in my direction.“I knew something was fishy with how fast you two got married.But you looked so happy.So genuinely happy.What could I say?But now, the contract part of it makes total sense.”She paused, her gaze drifting away as she tapped her chin.“What doesn’t make sense is how perfect you two were for each other.”
“It doesn’t matter now.He walked away.”
She frowned, wrapping an arm around me.“I’m sorry, babe.Let’s just hope he’s rotting in his own misery right now.Just…festering in unhappiness.”
“Crying himself to sleep each night,” I added.
“And crying into his Cheerios in the morning,” she said with a giggle.
“And maybe all his…plants die,” I blurted, then sighed.“No, I don’t wish that on him.Also, I took all my plants.Though I did leave the ones that need to stay in the greenhouse.”
“Yeah, that’s not gonna work.”She patted my knee as she took a sip of her wine.“So are you guys going to divorce now?”
I heaved a sigh.“I don’t know.I can’t bring myself to ask him.And he hasn’t reached out.So I guess we’ll just…stay married until one of us can finally speak to the other.”
“We should have a divorce party when it’s finalized,” Zoey suggested.“Don’t women do that nowadays?"
"I guess I'll find out," I said glumly before taking another sip of my wine.“I feel like an idiot saying it but…I really loved that man.”
“It looked like he loved you too,” Zoey said.“In fact, I was positive he loved you.The only thing that tipped me off was how fast you two moved.But it also made sense in a way.You two just seemed so…right for each other.”
I sighed, feeling more of that heartbreak kicking back to life inside me.“It shouldn’t feel this bad still.But I feel like I’ll never get over him.”
Zoey wrapped her arm around me again and pulled me into a hug.“Oh, honey.I promise it’ll get easier.”
“And I feel like an idiot because I can’t stop being invested in him and his projects,” I complained.“I loved being in his world, working alongside him, helping the people he served.I still go to the community meetings in Queens.I’ve been spending the last several weeks researching this stupid permit issue because I believe in what he does and I want to see him succeed.”
Zoey blinked.“Does he know you’ve been doing this?”
“No!I’ve just been spiraling off into my own internet rabbit hole.I’m really getting somewhere too.It’s all been fascinating research, I’ll be honest.But sometimes I look up and realize how far I’ve taken it and wonder if this is just me being too attached.”
“Do you think your research will help him?”she asked.“Or are you just using it as a way to feel close to him?”
My insides sank, because I knew Zoey was zeroing in on the thing I didn’t want to admit.“I think it’s a little of both.And I hate to admit that.”
And the longer Zoey sat with me that night, the more I realized something else I didn’t want to admit.
Nash had given up on us.
If he wanted to be here, to make nice, he would have.He was a man of action.And I…
Well, at this point, I was just a heartbroken single mom.
Back to square one.
