“Winnie,” I say softly, waiting for her to glance up at me.I'm not continuing until she does.I want her to know what I'm about to say is true.“You’re beautiful without makeup.You don’t need it.”
“Yeah, I'm sure.”She rolls her eyes.
“I'm serious.You’re breathtaking.I think I actually like you without makeup more.”
Her gaze snaps to mine and her brows furrow once again.“Why?”She whispers.
“Because I like seeing the real you.Not the version you like to create.Don’t get me wrong, you’re beautiful with makeup too, I just like you without it.”
She nibbles on her bottom lip as she stares out the window.I'm not sure what she’s thinking about, but Tali’s snoring softly on my shoulder.I slowly stand, careful to keep from waking her up.Then I disappear down the hallway to put her in the crib so I can take a shower.
Chapter 12
Winnie
Hiswordsareplayingon repeat in my head.How can he possibly think I look better without makeup?Doesn’t he see the bags under my eyes or how my eyebrows aren’t perfectly arched?The way my lips don’t have the perfect cupid’s bow and they’re a lighter color than I’d like?No, he can’t possibly like me without makeup.
I glance down the hallway at where he disappeared and wonder, not for the first time, where his head is at.No matter how many times I try to remind myself Jamie’s just my boss and nothing else, it feels different than it did when I worked for previous families.
Maybe it’s because I typically communicate more with the moms than the dads, but I don’t think that’s it.This is the first time I’ve lived with the family I'm nannying for, but I don’t think that’s what makes this feel different either.
There’s this connection I have with Jamie.I'm relaxed and myself around him.Letting him see me without makeup is proof of that.
My mind drifts to the guys I’ve dated over the years.I’ve never let any of them see me without a face full of makeup.Even Wheeler’s never seen me unless I was dolled up and ready to impress.It’s nice to not have to spend so much time getting ready in the morning.To metaphorically let my hair down and relax.
A text beeps on my phone and I quickly tug it out of my pocket to check it.I need to finish making dinner soon, but I have a few minutes to chat with whoever this is.
Wheeler: What are you doing?
I groan, not really wanting to talk to him.Saturday night was… awkward.I don’t know how many times I need to tell Wheeler we’re not right for each other.It’s time for both of us to move on.
He was smart enough to not text me the rest of the weekend, but I'm not sure if that’s because he assumed Jamie was around.Maybe he’s trying not to start a war with Jamie, but isn't afraid of a battle with me.
Winnie: Making dinner.
Jumping off the couch, I hurry into the kitchen and start peeling the potatoes.I don’t like to lie and if I get started now, I won’t feel like I lied to him.
Wheeler: Doesn’t Schmidt have a chef?
Winnie: I'm not Schmidt.
Wheeler: If you’re living with him, he should be feeding you, Winnie.
Winnie: Yes, he has a chef.But I wanted something else, so I’m making myself dinner.Is that ok with you?
I roll my eyes and continue peeling.I hate when he gets like this.I understand he cares about me and I care about him too, but I need him to realize I'm not his to worry about.He needs to find a woman who wants this overprotective man.
Wheeler: I'm sorry.I'm not trying to constantly jump at you.
Winnie: Then maybe you should stop.
Wheeler: I just…
Wheeler: I feel like I'm losing you.
Emotion clogs my throat as I try to swallow, but it feels like there’s a lump.My eyes fill with tears and I stare up at the ceiling, blinking repeatedly.I don’t want to cry.That’s the last thing I need right now.
Winnie: I'm not yours to lose, Chase.
