I turn to look in the mirror and realize I definitely look a bit rough and in need of a freshen-up before service.
‘Good luck! Not that you need it – you’re going to be amazing. I was telling Mum how awesome you are.’
‘You’re sweet,’ I say, wanting to hang up in embarrassment.
‘Oh, oh, oh, oh. One other thing. I just Friend-requested you on Facebook. Sorry if it’s a bit presumptuous, but I thought I’d do it anyway.’
For a moment I’m annoyed that she’s still talking, as I need to put on my make-up. But then it sinks in.YOU DID WHAT?
‘What?’
‘Ah, like I said, I’m sorry. I know you probably want to keep work and whatever separate – I know Anis does … please ignore it, if so. Oh God, I’m so embarrassed.’
I am silent for a moment as I start to feel my chest tighten again and I mouth ‘Fuck!’ at the ceiling.
‘I have to go, Roxy,’ I say and then, as brightly as I can, I add, ‘see you tomorrow.’
I hang up my phone and as I do so, notice there is a message from Heather from four hours earlier.
Missing you. Getting a bit bored here TBH. Let’s book in a chat tomorrow – it’s been ages.
I call her immediately, and she picks up after a couple of rings.
‘Hi, Heather,’ I say. ‘What are you up to?’
‘ELIZABETH,’ she replies, all perky and not at all bored-sounding. She sounds like she’s out, as I can hear music. ‘How the bloody devil are you? Let me turn the radio down.’
‘What are you up to?’ I repeat, desperate to conceal the panic in my voice.
‘You got my message then?’
‘Yes, yes.’ I realize I’m sweating under the armpits, and unbutton my shirt to try to get some air in. I gently close the bathroom door to make sure no one can hear me.
‘I can’t talk for long – just wanted to check in with you. It’s been so long.’
‘Are you okay?’
‘I’m okay. After I sent that message, Cristian whisked me off for the evening. He’s here with me now. Driving. Right next to me.’
That was a clear sign that I shouldn’t talk to her now, and I don’t even know what I’m going to say. I can’t mention the Friend request.
‘Oh, lovely. Make sure you get some pictures. But don’t post them on social media,’ I add quickly, wondering if I’m starting to sound like a weirdo with all my instructions.
‘I won’t. I’ve absolutely promised Cristian, but regardless, the job is long gone now. I’m sure some other person jumped at the chance.’
‘Jumped at the chance?’ I repeat back to her. It makes me feel sick that I’m policing her life almost as much as Cristian is at the moment.
‘Are you okay, Birdy? You sound a bit tense?’
‘Yeah, I guess.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Sorry, you know – I’m just worrying about your …’ I cringe and pray to the gods for forgiveness, ‘reputation.’
‘Can you give me a call back tomorrow or something? We’re driving, and Cristian is putting the roof down. Plus you keep cutting out,’ she says. Right at that moment there is a sharp knock on the door.
‘Heather! You have to come now. The first diners are here!’ It’s Bill.
