“I swear to the gods, Slate…if you don’t let me go to bed, I wi?—”
“What? Kill me?” His dark eyebrows raised pointedly.
“Why not? You’re supposed to be dead, right? So why don’t I make that a reality?” I held his gaze. My anger toward him hadn’t receded an ounce since he revealed that he was still alive and well. I had spent over a year grieving his death. Grievingus. I felt stupid for setting out to avenge his death. I had harbored guilt for moving on and developing feelings for Chrome. I’dhealed.Then, he just reappeared in my most desperate hour like a fucking guardian angel come to save the day, as if that would make it all okay? To dig the blade in the wound, Chrome had known all along.
Once I found a way to restore Chrome, I’d fucking kill him myself, just to bring him back and leave him behind. Fuck them.
Slate directed his focus at my boots, his chin following. “I don’t know how many times I have to tell you, Gray…I’m sorry. I had no choice.”
“Yeah, that seems to be everyone’s line these days. But what aboutmychoice? Or did I ever fucking have one?”
“You have to understand that your safety and protection have always taken priority. I was always nearby, ready to step in if needed, but you didn’t need me. You proved me right all those years ago.” Slate lifted his hand, his fingertips brushing against the top of mine before swiftly dropping to his side. “I’ll always be in your corner.”
“Well, that’s sweet and all, but I don’t want or need you to be. I don’t trust you,” I snapped. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to bed.” I pushed past him without giving him any more room for debate.
Every time I spoke to him was like shoving a fresh dagger into my heart over the scarred wound I had worked tirelessly to heal. I buried the emotions. That was for another day.
I could feel Slate watching me walk down the corridor, his stare willing me to turn around. I refused to give him even a glance over my shoulder as I headed to the hallway opposite my room that led to the other side of the Hollow’s lodge. It was nine in the morning, and others began to stir around and below me. I needed sleep. Something I’d been lacking most nights. Maybe I’d findmy reprieve this time.
The Hollow felt empty without Chrome’s presence, as if it were missing its heartbeat. I clenched my jaw, my nails digging into my palms as I made a beeline for the suite at the very end.
Walking into Chrome’s room always cinched my chest into an emotional knot of self-loathing pain, bringing flashbacks of that fateful day at the King’s Palace. I let them come, allowing them to serve as my motivation. They reminded me of yetmoreof my failures. I couldn’t fail this time. I wouldn’t.
The door clicked shut behind me, and I breathed in Chrome’s waning scent. I squeezed my eyes to ward off the suffocating emotions in my throat, but a tear forced its way out of the corner of my eye. I swiped it away—no more weakness.
The room remained exactly as Chrome had left it the day that Kinetics had attacked the Hollow. This was where I slept now. I changed in my room, except when I wore his clothes to bed. And I showered in my room, too. I didn’t want to disturb his space, because eventually, he’d return. But I just needed to feel his presence. Or at least a ghost of it.
I walked to his chest of drawers and pulled out a t-shirt and some baggy sweats. I’d shower first thing when I woke up. I was too exhausted and drained to do anything other than change and collapse on the bed. I sniffled, wishing I’d had more time with him, regretting how I wasted my final day with him in anger before everything went to hell.
The horrid things that took place after the battle slithered up from my subconscious whenever I closed my eyes. Hazel’s body, hanging from a self-made noose in the prisons. Chrome’s broken eyes, pleading with me to understand his choice to deplete for that final time. I ruminated over every way I could’ve avoided my father’s blade to my spine, which would’ve prevented all of this.
It’s all your fault. You did this, Gray.
Everything had gone so wrong when I accidentally transported myself to the King’s Palace following the battle. I still wasn’t surehow I managed to do it, and it irked me to no end that I hadn’t been able to do it again since returning home.
I sighed, the soft and loose fabric of Chrome’s clothing embracing me in the closest way I could currently get to him. His violin sat on a stand at the end table, conjuring the memory of that day I walked in and caught him playing.
Crawling into his bed, I pulled the covers up to my chin, focusing on the bond that tied us together. While still present, only silence answered me, along with a deep-seated hunger that continued to grow, seeking more power.
I needed to find him, and soon. When I woke, I planned to lock myself in Orion’s room for the day withThe Book of the Arcaneafter debriefing him on everything that transpired during the battle. Well, maybe everything. I hadn’t decided if I should inform him about the strange man from earlier. I wasn’t even sure what I’d say. I’d met a Kinetic who wanted Chrome dead?How urgent.
There was something very familiar about Shadow that I knew for certain. His resemblance to Chrome was uncanny. I just hoped I could find a way to stop him from following through on his threat to carry out his vengeance.
Chapter Two
Cotton
Chandeliers glittered above me, winking from the sunlight’s rays cutting through them. These were different from the chandeliers that hung inside the King’s Palace. Something about these felt magical, as if they had been crafted from purity. Every day for the past two months, I’d yearned to touch them, even if only with a brush of my fingertips. Yet, I also feared they’d disintegrate at my touch. Nothing about me felt pure.
“Cotton?” Scarlett’s voice snapped me from the trance the dazzling fixtures put me in. “Valik needs to speak with us in the foyer.”
When Scarlett and I crossed through the portal that Chrome and Gray had created back at the King’s Palace, Valik had stood on the other side, almost as if he’d been waiting for us. Scarlett had been unconscious, teetering on the edge of death. Valik claimed he could help heal her faster, but I’d been skeptical. After a day had passed and she still hadn’t awoken, I gave in to his offer, desperate not to lose my closest friend.
When Scarlett returned to consciousness, we’d wanted nothing more than to return to the King’s Palace to go help the others. Butwhen Valik broke the news of the Royal Domain’s fate, we realized we were stranded. We’d insisted on going back and finding Gray; however, Valik had instructed us to remain safe at the Celestial Castle with him so we wouldn’t endanger ourselves and create more issues for Gray to resolve.
After a few weeks, Valik’s eccentricity soon won us over.
I jerked my gaze from the chandeliers and fixed Scarlett with narrowed eyes, unease stirring in my chest like a flock of ravens.
