“Come on,” I tell him as I quickly pull up his jeans and underwear. “Let’s get you warmed up.”
Taking one of his arms, I drape it over my shoulders before leaning down to scoop him up in my arms. He clings to me, trembling against my chest, as I carry him out of the shadows and back toward the road.
I thought I was onlyplayingthe bad guy, but after tonight…
I think I might just be one.
Despite being pressed against Isaac’schest with my face buried in the warmth of his neck, my teeth won’t stop fucking chattering. I don’t understand what’s happening to me right now or why, but for some inexplicable reason, I trust Isaac to take care of me.
When I realize I have no idea where he’s taking me, I open one eye to see that he’s carrying me toward his car.
“Are you k-kidnapping me?”
The stuttering isn’t due to fear but rather the fact I can’t stop fucking shaking.
He laughs under his breath and says, “No, but that’s an interesting idea. Good to know you at least still have your sense of humor.”
It was onlymostlya joke, but I don’t tell him that. Instead, I wrap my arms a little tighter around his neck.
When we reach his car, he sets me on my feet by the passenger door and opens it, still keeping one arm around me. He helps me inside, closes the door, and rounds the car to slip into the driver’s seat. He immediately starts the engine and turns the heat up.
I wrap my arms around my middle and try like hell to stopmy teeth from rattling. Warm air blasts from the vents, but it doesn’t seem to be helping. I’m practically rocking in my seat, and my mind feels as icy and numb as the rest of me. I’m pretty sure there are fresh tears rolling down my cheeks, but I don’t know why.
“Come here.”
Isaac reaches for me, and I eagerly crawl across the center console of his small car to land right in his lap, my side pressed to his front and my feet in the passenger seat. I curl into him, my face once more buried in the crook of his neck, inhaling his scent. He smells like crisp air and pine.
“I’m so sorry, Jackson.”
His warm, velvety voice envelops me as he holds me in his arms, one of his hands rubbing comforting circles against my back. However, the meaning of his words doesn’t quite reach me past the exhaustion and this hazy, sickening dread in my gut.
“Why can’t I st-stop shaking?”
“I think it might be similar to sub drop,” he says, keeping his voice low and soothing. “It’s just a theory. But between the adrenaline from the bridge and the endorphins from, well…”
“The best blow job of my life?”
His chest rumbles with a quiet laugh. “I’m sure it was just the lingering adrenaline.”
Maybe that was part of it, but I don’t tell him that. It was more. It washim. I’m still trying to process the shock that came from him getting on his knees for me, but I don’t regret it for a second.
“But between all of that, you’re coming down from a lot of hormones. It’s normal to feel like this as everything balances back out after a high-intensity state like that.”
I nod as though I understand more than I do. Maybe I’ll try to comprehend the biology and chemistry of it later.
Right now, I just want the tears that I haven’t given permission to fall to fucking stop.
The collar of Isaac’s coat is damp against my cheek as I bury my face a little further into him as though that’ll help, like I can use his skin as a dam. Eventually, the tears start to slow, but I refuse to stop clinging to him. My hand grips the front of his coat in a tight fist as I continue trembling in his lap.
Several minutes pass before the warmth in the car finally starts to seep all the way into my bones, the hold Isaac has on me putting me back together again.
He continues rubbing my back, the steady rise and fall of his chest just as comforting as his touch.
“I really am so sorry,” he says after the long stretch of silence.
Shifting so I can rest my cheek against his shoulder, I sniff and attempt to clear the fog from my head. Everything feels so heavy right now I can’t help but want to lighten the mood.
“You mean for nearly killing me?”
