“It’ll be a tough one, but I think we can pull it off.” He sucked his lower lip between his teeth. “You know, my buddies and I sometimes go to the gay bar on Mill after a game. Maybe you could join us?” He stuffed a roll into his mouth.
I eyed him. I’d only visited the place a few times last year with Grace, but we’d enjoyed it. How much more enjoyable would it be with queer guys? “Okay.”
After more lightconversation with Eli and gossiping about friends back home, we walked to the parking lot. We’d parked in similar areas, so I wouldn’t assume he was walking me to my car. As we reached my Toyota Corolla, we stopped.
“You have the same car your mom helped you buy in high school.” Facing me, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and gave me a warm smile.
“I do. Are you still driving that old beat-up Ford your dad gave you?” My gaze swept the parking lot and stopped on what looked like the truck.
“I am. It’s easy to fix.” He bit his lower lip, his gaze resting on my mouth. “I had a pleasant time with you tonight.”
“Yeah? Me too.” My breath quickened as I focused on his wet, plump lips. Not only were his hugs and his blowjobs the best, he was also a great kisser. But we weren’t?—
Locked on me, he placed his hand on my shoulder and caressed it. Leaning in, he brushed his lips across my mouth.
Oh, my God…I turned my head.
He kissed my cheek and then pulled away, skimming his hand down the back of his hair. “I’m uh, sorry. I thought.” He huffed a sigh. “I thought it would be okay.”
“It’s, I don’t know. I’m not ready.” My heart pattered into myears. I sounded stupid. We’d been lovers once, and I couldn’t kiss him goodbye now? But it meant more than goodbye. It was a promise of more, and I wasn’t positive I could give it to him yet.
“Yeah, okay.” He clenched his jaw for a beat and then grinned. “I’ll see you at the game on Saturday.”
“Yes, see you at the game.” Between school, practices and the team dinner tomorrow night, we’d have no time to hang out before then. An ache ghosted across my heart. “And I’m looking forward to the gay bar on Saturday night.”
“Me too.” Hanging his head, he said, “Goodnight, Wren. Drive safe.” He took a step away and twisted, his brows wrinkling. “Can you text me when you get home, so I know you made it okay?”
“Sure.” It was only a few miles, but this was Eli, always concerned about me. I’d always felt so safe with him…until the day I didn’t. The one time he didn’t have my back. A pang cut through my chest as I opened my car door. Yeah, it still hurt, after all this.
After driving home,I’d texted Eli to let him know I’d made it and dropped onto the sofa. Grace’s door was closed, and her car had been in the lot, so she must be in bed. I needed someone to talk to after the dinner with Eli. I held up my phone and called Ethan. Knowing him, he’d still be awake.
The phone rang a few times and clicked.
“Dude, what’s up?” Ethan asked.
“Hey, just calling to see how you’re doing.” Okay, lie, but I’d start there. “My mom said you got a job as a bank teller?” I settled in, tucking my legs to the side.
“I did. The pay is okay, but I’m hoping to take some classes for a certification and then see if I can get something closer to IT work.”
“Yeah, you shouldn’t let your degree go to waste.” I glanced toward the hallway where the bedrooms were. I should talk softly to keep from waking Grace up. Plus, if she heard me talking about Eli, she’d be out here in an instant.
“So…why are you really calling me? It’s late.”
With one side of my lips curling, I said, “I, uh, had dinner with Eli. We’ve been talking.” My heart warmed as our almost-kiss floated through my head. Damn it, I had to put him in the friend zone.
“I’m proud of you. It’s progress. Have you forgiven him then?” Ethan asked.
“A bit. It still hurts though.” I played with the hem of my T-shirt. “Eli’s done little things for me, like buy me flowers and bring me treats.” I had to give Eli kudos for trying.
“He’s courting you. Does he want to date again?”
With a slow nod, I said, “Yes, he said as much, and things are different now. He’s out to his family.” Then what was my problem?
“What do you want? Do you think you can move beyond what happened and not let it ruin a future with him?”
Damn, sometimes he was spot on. “I think that's the problem. I don’t know.” I’d spent almost four years building hate in my heart for him. I gritted my teeth. How could I release it after a few discussions and presents?
“I guess only time will tell then.” He inhaled deeply. “If he’s out to his parents though, it sounds like the problems you had in high school are gone.”
