She was staring at me, her eyes dark and her jaw set.
And I must have been a very, very stupid man, because instead of leaving like Xavier, I said, “You don’t have to do that, you know.”
“Do what?”
“You don’t have to put your walls up for us. We’re on your side. We’re here to help you. Whatever happened tonight between you and Cornelius? You don’t have to hide it from us.”
Her eyes widened, but she recovered quickly, that slippery mask of indifference sliding over her features once again. “I’m not hiding anything, and you can stop acting allnoble. It’s late and I’m tired. That’s all.”
The knife in my chest twisted. “Right.”
Why do you even try? When are you going to learn your damn lesson and give up on her?
“Good night, then.”
Rummy said nothing as I stepped out into the hallway.
Chapter 19
Rummy
Ibarely slept. Even a scalding bath could not calm my racing heart. Cornelius knew. Heknew.
He’d sensed that tiny piece of darkness I had hidden from everyone my entire life.
Everyone living, anyway.
Chaos magic.
The gift of death.
No, I didn’t have aconnectionto the dead like he did. I didn’t…
Honestly, I had no ideawhatI could do with my power. All I knew was that my magic held unbelievable darkness. That any time I even considered trying to use my power, I regretted it.
Death. Destruction. Demise.
That’s all that awaited me.
My entire life, I had hidden that piece of myself. I had no magic. It was better to believe that than to face the reality: that I was evil, twisted.
Everyone else used their power for good. Huntyr? Wolf? They had gifts from the damn goddess herself.
What did I have? Acurse?
I wasn’t sure. But I sure as all hells couldn’t tell Jessiah about it.
He would never look at me the same. Cornelius was the one person who had the potential to understand what I’d been through. And it was possible that he could help me figure out what kind of beast lay resting deep in my soul, ready to pounce.
If I was being honest, sometimes it felt as though that beast was going to claw its way out of my heart, whether I wanted it to or not.
This was better. This way, I wouldn’t be so alone.
Did I feel guilty keeping details of my conversation with Cornelius from Xavier and Jessiah? Of course I did. They wanted to help me. I believed that.
But I’d take solace knowing I’d given them a partial truth. That was better than nothing, right? Cornelius did possess a death magic.
But I knew a lot more than I’d let on.
