I don’t have time to protest more when he drops to his knees in front of me. Since he is so tall and I am seated on the edge of the counter, his face is at level with my pussy. I am about to come just from him staring at it.
Alex licks his lips in anticipation, hunger like never before overtaking us both. He drops his mouth in between my legs, his lips latching onto my clit in an instant. My eyes roll to the back of my head, and my spirit leaves my body. I latch my fingers onto his hair and pull hard as all I can focus on is him and the way he makes me feel.
Even though I think I am prepared, the orgasm hits me out of nowhere. Pleasure mixed with disappointment flood my senses. I was not ready for it to be over already. Nevertheless, I ride the wave, pulling harder on Alex’s hair as I press myself more into his mouth, not wanting him to ever stop.
The crash down to earth is just as painful as in the way it started. But I am still surprised when I burst into tears. Crying is not something I’ve ever done in front of Alex, not even in frustration, and his reaction proves as much.
“What the fuck!”
I watch him as he stands up from the floor, wiping his mouth against the sweater his has on. He stares at me like he’s debating if he should find out what’s caused this, or just make a run for it.
When he pulls me into his arms and presses my head against his chest, I fall in love with him a little more. Considering I was already there from before, what he does now adds a new layer of despair.
It makes me realize that nothing has ever gone the easy way for me in this life, not as a child and most definitely not as an adult. It hurts my heart to realize that there’s a possibility that I’m just not the type of person who people would want to keep in their lives. They always want me for a good time, but they never want to keep me forever.
I am disposable.
That’s a lot to take in.
EIGHTEEN
Alex
MakingMona cry was nowhere on my list of things I need to do to win her back. I now stare at her, with my heart going a mile a minute, wondering what I could’ve done that would cause her to sob like this.
I wrap a hand around the nape of her head and pull her into my chest. She brings her arms around my waist, and when I run my free hand up and down her back, I come into contact with bare skin. It reminds me that she is pretty much naked, crying her heart out against my chest while I stand fully dressed and with her juices still fresh on my lips.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper against her hair.
I’m not even sure what I am apologizing for, if it is for the very mixed signals I’ve been sending her for years now, or if I am apologizing for showing up at her apartment tonight.
She gives me a weak pat on the back before pushing away from me. I let go of her since I don’t want to cause her even moregrief. As I stare at her mostly naked body, I feel myself twitch in my pants, and I seriously hate my life. Gotta be honest, I was hoping for some relief, too, as I was licking her clean only a few moments ago.
I grunt in a bit of distress, trying to rearrange myself without making it too obvious. Mona, who knows me more than anyone else in my life, reads my discomfort correctly.
“I think you’ll live.”
Her voice sounds stuffy from crying, and I temporarily forget about my own physical ailments.
“Where are you going?” I ask when I see that she’s about to leave me alone in her kitchen.
She chuckles at the question. “Bathroom. I didn’t want to announce it.”
Rolling my eyes, I lean forward and press a hard kiss against her forehead.
“This is weird, Alex,” she mumbles. “Me with no clothes on in the kitchen, crying…” She clears her throat. “Give me a minute.”
Since I don’t see that I have a choice, I step back and let her pass, my eyes glued to her incredible ass as she walks away.
Her apartment is small, so I don’t get a lot of time to admire her backside before the door to the bathroom closes behind her. I swallow hard as soon as she is out of sight, feeling at a loss, which is not anything that normally happens to me. But I have no idea what just happened that would cause Mona to cry like that. I am very confident that she came, so it can’t be that.
My mind is going into a million directions when my eyes drop to the food containers on the table. In a rush, I start picking everything up, making sure that I don’t leave a mess behind. I even take it one step further and wet a paper towel which I use to wipe the table off.
“Looks good.”
I give myself a pat on the back when I say the words out loud. Mona’s light giggle from behind me startles me, and I spin around to look at her.
“It does look good,” she agrees. “Thanks for doing that.”
