ELEVEN
Mona
It’s beentwo days since I saw Alex. I haven’t been able to sleep since. My focus at work has been non-existent, and I almost burst into tears a couple of times.
The fact that I haven’t heard back from Julian is not helping me either. I got no other interesting hits from this godforsaken app. And the ones I did get were just filled with inappropriate comments and sexual innuendos. I’m starting to think that the picture I posted for my profile is giving out the wrong vibes.
Now, as I am sitting at the small table in my almost non-existent kitchen, I push away the sandwich I have in front of me, then pick up my phone. I open theHolidatesapp, wincing at the messages I see in my inbox.
“Pigs,” I mutter to myself as I continue scanning all the messages in the hopes I’ll see one from Julian Lewis. When Iget to the bottom of the list without finding his name anywhere in my inbox, anger floods all my senses. I decide that he needs a good talking to. Who does he think he is to leave me stranded like this? If he found someone else for whatever party he needed me for, he should be a man and tell me so. Meanwhile, he’s leaving me hanging, and the closer we get to the holidays, the harder it will be to find a good prospect.
I tap on the screen to start a new message in which I type furiously as I basically tell him that I have plenty of guys to choose from, and if I don’t hear back from him by morning, then I am moving on.
By the time I am finished typing all that, my hands feel clammy and cramped. I place the phone back on the table and drop my head in my hands. This is all too much, and I need someone to tell me if I am going crazy or not.
Picking the phone back up, I call my best friend. Elizabeth went through some things a few months ago, and she stayed with me for a couple of weeks while she figured things with her man. Once that got resolved, she went back to Austin. But I feel like she owes me, and I am counting on her advice regardless of the fact that she tends to be a ditz, and a lucky one at that.
Take this guy she’s with for example. They had a fling in New York, after which he had to leave for Austin. There was some drama with her father in there, where the guy, Logan, played hockey for the team Elizabeth’s father owns. When he learned of their hidden affair, he traded Logan to Austin. What did Elizabeth do? Left all her life here without even knowing if he still wanted her. She showed up there, told him that she wanted him, and boom, before long, they’re now together, with ups and downs, and lots of obstacles, but he wants her enough to fight through them all.
Meanwhile, what have I gotten? A guy who’s been stringing me along for four years. And when I finally got the courage toblock him once he gave me the boot for the last time, I am now jumping through hoops to attend a party where he will be as well, and I have to show up with a hot guy on my arm so that he knows for certain that I am over him.
“Mona!” She sounds really excited to hear from me, making me roll my eyes at the ceiling.
“I’m glad you remember who I am,” I tease. “Seeing that you never call and all that.”
“I am so sorry!” She sounds loud and overly excited. “It’s been so busy here! I got a job at a gallery!”
I smile, happy to hear that she’s figuring out her life away from her father’s money, while I am sad for myself. My life is imploding.
“How’s online fake dating going? Found anyone good?” she asks.
Tears gather in my eyes, and I wipe at my cheek furiously when I feel one sliding down the side of my face.
“I was supposed to go out to dinner with this one guy. He never showed.”
The pitifulness in my tone is causing me to take pause. When have I become this whimpering fool? It’s ridiculous, and I don’t like it. The problem is that I don’t know how to snap out of it.
“That’s totally his loss.”
Elizabeth’s tone is way too soothing. I want her to feel as enraged about it as I do.
“It’s my loss, too,” I snap at her. “I still don’t have anyone for this party. I can’t stand the thought of Alex thinking that he discarded me that easily.”
“Who cares what he thinks?” She is so innocent in the way she asks, definitely not matching the vibe I’m looking for.
“I care, Em!” I drop my head back and stare at the ceiling. “I don’t know why, but I care. I want him to know that I’m not pining over him anymore. I am totally over him, I…”
She clears her voice softly. “Are you, though?”
I don’t know what she’s asking me now that she interrupted my train of thought. “Am I what?”
“You said you’re over him. Are you?”
I sigh and get ready to explain it to her like she’s two. “I did not say that I was over him. I said that I wanted him to think I was over him.”
“Ah…” A chuckle echoes over the line. “I get it now.”
I doubt that she does, and, to be honest, I am annoyed that she’s not just going along with my craziness.
