ONE
Mona
Internet dating is scary,I decide as I stare at the person across the table from me. He’s been going on and on about all the plants he grows in his mother’s basement.
”I would never keep shrubs down there,” he tells me. “They require too much upkeep, constant trimming so they don’t get out of control…”
I take a sip from my drink, completely blocking out everything he has to say. In my mind, I fantasize about me getting up from this chair, then simply walking away without saying goodbye or anything. I just want out.
”Some stay small, and I like them on the bushy side, if you know what I mean.”
He raises and lowers his eyebrows, looking all creepy and gross.
”That’s it.” I slam the glass on the table, the liquid sloshing around and spilling over. I point a finger at this guy. “You are weird, and I don’t like you.”
The look of shock on his face makes me want to laugh, but I manage to hold it in.
“What do you mean by that?”
Rolling my eyes, I finally let out a snort. “I can’t believe you even have to ask, Daryl. But I’ll tell you, hoping that I’m doing the next girl you’re going out with a favor.”
He sits up straight, like he is ready to take notes. He is very serious about finding himself a girlfriend. Thing is, he’s not even bad looking, which is why I even agreed to go out with him. And he never gave out this freaky vibe in any communication we had prior to us meeting for the first time. In person, though, what an unlikable creature.
”You do not talk about your mother’s bushy plants while on a date, Daryl,” I start.
”But…”
I put a hand up to stop him. “Never. There is no normal girl in this world who wants to hear about that.”
”But they’re not my mother’s plants.” He is offended. “They are mine. I do all the work. I water them, I make sure that the soil is…”
A long puff of air escapes my lips. I am so frustrated with him and my life as a whole. I hate that I am in this position, and I hate even more the man who put me in it.
”Why are you growing plants in your mother’s basement, Daryl?” I ask. “Does she not have a yard?”
”She does, but…”
I slash my hands through the air. “There is nobut. She. Has. A. Yard. Use. The. Freakin’. Yard!”
My voice raises the more I speak, and it is safe to say that I am yelling at him by the time I end my sentence.
”It’s a small yard.” The man is still arguing with me on this. “And it gets too cold overnight. The frost…”
”I can’t take it anymore.” Grabbing the glass off the table, I down it in one go before I slam it back down. “You need to put this in your bio on the site.”
I rummage through my purse, looking for my wallet. I let out a sigh of relief when I find cash in it. I take a twenty out and drop it on the table. We didn’t get to the food, so this should be plenty for the one drink I had.
I stand up and pull my skirt down, taking the coat off the back of the chair and putting it on. Swinging the purse over my shoulder, I realize that my move is a bit too enthusiastic because I almost hit the person behind me in the head with it.
”You’re leaving?” Daryl’s eyes are round in shock when he asks that. “But we barely sat down. I made a reservation in advance…”
“I don’t want to waste your time, Daryl.”
Staring at him, I wonder how much more honest I should be with him. Then, I decide that all the way is best.
”You should go to the botanical garden and walk around every day, spot a girl who does the same. Then, ask her out. That would be your person.”
”But…”
