“When did you get so good at this?”
Raleigh entered the room again and settled on the couch, resting his head against the back. “Best friends always are.” He nudged me with his leg. “Now go. I’ll stay until you fall asleep.”
I opened my mouth to thank him, but only got a “Go!” as he kicked his feet up on the table.
I called to check on Hannah, and it was about as awkward as you can imagine. Neither of us knew what to do or say. In a sense, I guess it was a good thing: it meant both of us were figuring things out as we went. Except Hannah knew how to have a dad, whereas I had no idea how to have a daughter. As an only child, siblings were never a part of the picture, and so I didn’t even have the benefit of any niblings running around.
I retreated to my bed and waited quietly, hoping Raleigh would think I’d fallen asleep. I waited for a while, but the big man stayed right where he was. Frustrated, I flipped onto my back and stared at the ceiling. I couldn’t shake the memory of Erin’s eyes when I told her I wasn’t going to New York with her. Everything about that final night played on a loop in my head. Back then, I never would’ve guessed she’d choose to break things off. It hadn’t been heartbreak in her eyes that night—it’d been anger. She’d called me selfish and childish.I probably was. But the tightness in my chest at the thought of going to New York and doing the college thing had been too much to bear. Even lying there in my bed, I started to feel it.
I sat up, trying to rub the ache away. Maybe that was why Erin hadn’t told me. A kid was a lot more permanent than going to college.
I squeezed my eyes shut as the room started to spin. My heartbeat thudded in my ears. The pain in my chest jolted down my arms. Nausea churned my gut, and I tried to swallow the bile threatening to rise—not quick enough. My legs felt like jelly as I wobbled out of bed. I stumbled to the bathroom just in time to surrender to the heaving of my stomach. Footsteps sounded behind me as Raleigh rushed into the bathroom.
“You okay?” he asked, keeping his distance as I emptied my lunch. Well, my happy hour.
Ireallydidn’t want him to see me like this. “Fine,” I spat, wiping my mouth with the back of my shaking hand. I collapsed, leaning against the closed door of the shower. I pushed my hair away from my face—it was drenched in sweat.
“It’s a little soon to be hungover already, don’t you think?”
My heart thundered against my chest. My best friend in the entire world stood in front of me, and I couldn’t bring myself to say the words I was truly feeling. “Drank too much,” I lied.
“You?” Raleigh studied me with a dubious expression, but thankfully he chose to let it go. “Come on,” he said, holding a hand out, “let’s get you in the shower.”
“I don’t want a shower.”
“Tough shit.”
“I want to get back in bed,” I whined.
“Good. Let’s get this shower out of the way, then.” When I protested further, he speared me with a no-nonsense look. “You just threw up and you’re covered in sweat. Take a cold shower. Trust me, you’ll feel better.”
I looked from Raleigh’s hand to his eyes. Neither wavered. With a sigh, I let him pull me to my feet. He turned on the shower, then left the room while I stepped in without waiting for it to heat up. The cold was a shock to my senses, but it seemed to do the trick. By the time I wrapped my towel around my waist and exited the bathroom, I felt stable. Not calm, exactly, but it was a step in the right direction.
“Feel better?”
I tossed a grunt of affirmation toward where Raleigh was entering my bedroom with a glass of water.
“You know you can talk to me, right? About anything.”
“I don’t want to talk. I don’t even want to think. I want to sleep.” I grabbed a pair of shorts from my dresser and gave him a pointed look.
He snickered. “I’ve seen you naked before.”
I rolled my eyes, but slipped my shorts on underneath the towel before tossing it into the basket in the corner. “What are you still doing here, anyway? Go home to your husband.”
“You sure?”
Tired of talking, I grabbed Raleigh by the collar of his shirt and hauled him toward the door—which he allowed, since I had no chance of actually budging the man if he didn’t want to be moved. “I’m sure. I don’t need a babysitter; just sleep. I’ll see you for my shift tomorrow.”
“Okay.” Raleigh backed out of the room. “But Jack said he could cover?—”
“Leave, Raleigh.” I forced a grin. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
This time, I watched out the window until his car was gone, then returned to the bed and closed my eyes. Though I desperately wanted to sleep, it didn’t come easily. I tossed and turned for what felt like hours. When I finally drifted off, it was a restless sleep. I awoke every hour.
By the time my shift rolled around, I was dragging. Headsturned as I walked into the bar—and not for the usual reason. I didn’t need anyone to tell me that I looked rough. As the night wore on, I was quiet. I didn’t flirt with every customer who turned my way, not even the woman who batted her eyelashes at me and trailed her hand down her sternum in an obvious attempt to bring my eyes down to her chest—which didn’t work. I blew past the pickup line she fed me.
“What can I get you?”
