“Oh, you are no help at all!”
He sighed.
“On the contrary. I am entirely helpful. I intend to be perfectly silent while you save us all.”
Mrs. Bennet, however, was unmoved by irony. She fluttered about issuing instructions for the household as if the visit were a royal tour.
Elizabeth watched Jane stroke Sophocles’s head gently, the cat rumbling in low approval. Despite her amusement, she felt the prickle of unease that came whenever marriage and security were brought up so forcefully.
Marriage. Entail. Survival. Nonsense that repeated itself on such occasions, more and more upsetting and obsessive.
Her gaze softened at Sophocles, who yawned luxuriously and closed his eyes. At least he demanded nothing from her but honesty, a little milk, and kindness.
Elizabeth leaned back against the window and muttered softly, “If only people were as easy to judge as you.”
He twitched an ear at her voice but did not bother to open his eyes.
And the room settled into its usual mild chaos—plans, arguments, and all—beneath the watchful, unimpressed eye of the cat who ruled them all.
***
Mrs. Bennet spent the better part of that evening in a state of restless triumph, striding about the drawing room with all the purpose of a general preparing for battle.
“Lizzy, you shall not laugh! I am determined you will receive Mr. Collins properly,” she declared, stabbing the air with a rolled-up list of household tasks. “You will speak gently. You will smile. And you will wear that pink muslin I like so well.”
Elizabeth raised her brows. “Must I, Mama? I think Sophocles has claimed it for nesting.”
“Then wash it!” snapped Mrs. Bennet, ignoring the unhelpful snort from Mr. Bennet behind his book.
Sophocles, who had taken possession of Elizabeth’s vacated seat, gave a slow blink, completely unmoved by the uproar. His plumed tail curled neatly around his paws.
Kitty and Lydia, meanwhile, were engaged in their own excited whispering about the possibility of a ball at Meryton now that Netherfield was let.
“Mama, do you think Mr. Bingley will host a dance straightaway?” Lydia squeaked, practically bouncing in place. “He must! Jane will look so handsome at a ball! And there will be officers! Think of it!”
Jane’s cheeks pinkened at the mention of Mr. Bingley, but she busied herself smoothing Sophocles’s fur. He accepted the attention with regal tolerance.
Mrs. Bennet seized on this new topic with all the fervour of a convert.
“Yes! Oh yes, he must hold a ball. We must be ready! Jane, you must have new gloves at least—Lizzy, mind you don’t embarrass us with your scornful ways. Kitty, Lydia, stop shrieking like wild creatures! Where is Mary? That girl will be the death of me with her obsessive novel reading.”
Mr. Bennet lowered his book. “Wild creatures may be preferable to some of the gentlemen you plan to throw them at.”
Elizabeth smothered a laugh. Sophocles, too, let out what sounded like a feline grunt of agreement, which made Jane giggle despite her mortification.
“I assure you, Papa,” Elizabeth said solemnly, “if any gentleman at this ball proves unworthy, Sophocles shall see him off personally afterwards.”
“Excellent,” Mr. Bennet replied gravely. “Shall I commission him a sword?”
Mrs. Bennet looked scandalised. “You will mock, but this is serious! Mr. Collins arriving, Netherfield let, a ball to prepare for—this is our moment! You should pay a visit to our new neighbour—Mr. Bingley, is that his name? I heard that he has begun bringing his furniture and luggage. Oh! I must speak toHill immediately about the linens—Jane, you shall write to your Aunt Philips for the latest on the Meryton assembly—”
And so the Bennet household surrendered to cheerful, chaotic industry, executing Mrs. Bennet’s grand plan with cleaning, washing, and vigorous carpet-whipping—though in no particular order.
***
Half an hour later, Elizabeth found herself pressed into cleaning out the small parlour with Mary, who offered solemn reflections on the moral dangers of assemblies while attempting to polish the mantelpiece.
“I only hope,” Mary said earnestly, “that any ball will not encourage vanity and idleness. Cards and dancing are so often misused.”
