“Coke?”
She snorted. “Morphine. And to answer your question, I’m Ndidi. I’m a midwife, and I have a depressing amount of experience treating women in your condition.”
“Angry?”
Her frown clearly saiddon’t bullshit me.“I was able to take a look at your hands and your visible injuries, but you’ve been through enough without me undressing you without your permission. Now you’re awake, lift your shirt and I’ll see what I can do about the rest of your injuries.”
“No.” I crossed my arms over my chest, the pain relief enabling me to make the action. I’d probably regret it later.
“It’s me or the Knights’ doctor, Giant. He’s a big, lovable oaf and a total softie, but it was agreed you might prefer a female doctor.”
Anger crawled up the back of my neck. “Who?”
“Giant—”
“No.Whohad the nerve to discuss what I needed, while I was unconscious?”
“First of all,” she said, also crossing her arms over her chest, a formidable opponent, “it was not justyouwe discussed. Over fifty people were rescued from the—operation.”
“You can call it a sex trafficking shit show if you like,” I offered. “Call a spade a spade.”
“There are twelve of you here, in the sanctuary at the Alpha Knights’ home. The others were taken to whatever hospitals had beds and to known organisations that offer refuge, like the Knights.”
“You keep saying that like I should know what it means,” I muttered, dragging my battered body up until I could sit against the plush pillows. Goddamn, this bed was a dream. It was one hell of an upgrade from the pillory-stocks situation.
“The Alpha Knights are the bikers who raided that farm,” Ndidi explained. “Now, lift your shirt so I can see if your ribs are broken.”
“Fuck off and bother someone else.” So there were others here from the farm. I wondered if any of the women in the same barn as me had made it.
“The sooner I examine you, the sooner I fuck off to bother someone else,” Ndidi said with a little smile.
My nostrils flared. I wanted to claw her eyes out, but I wanted her gone more, so I lifted my shirt. Half wondered where it had even come from. “Don’t eventhinkabout doing an internal exam,” I spat.
I was too messed up, too broken to allow anyone close. Even with morphine in my system, I could feel the damage and I—I didn’t want to know. How bad it was. How wrecked I was. Whether I would ever heal.
“That is a very bad idea—” she began.
“Take it or leave it,” I snarled, beginning to shake, my breathing sharper.
“Depending on what injuries you—”
I ripped the IV out of my hand and let anger and fear and every other jagged-edged emotion power me as I threw myself out of bed. “Get the fuck out.”
“I’m not leaving until you—”
“Out!”I screamed, shaking, curling my hands into fists and gasping at the shot of pain that made it through the morphine. Great, I was justthatbroken.
“I’m trying tohelpyou,” Ndidi pressed, not budging even when I shoved at her shoulders, tears leaping to my eyes. “Everyone here is trying to help you. You’re safe now, and not a single person will lay their hands on you without permission. But to help you, I need to know what I’m dealing with.”
“You can’t help me,” I argued, shoving her back a step, eyeing the room—clean, tidy, warmed by sapphire blue curtains, a tan plaid rug, and a lamp that cast low, amber light everywhere. And the door, across the room, which I guided Ndidi towards, whether she liked it or not. “No one can help me. Thanks for trying. Thanks for the drugs. Don’t come again.”
Relief hit my system with as much power as the painkillers when the door handle turned, then I muscled Ndidi into the hallway beyond, not sure where the strength came from but certain this was all I had—this one moment.
“I appreciate it,” I added, guilt sneaking through my ribs like a knife, before I slammed the door shut and twisted the lock on the handle.
Then I collapsed to the floor, struggling for air, still not sure where I was or what the fuck was going on and terrified of all of it.
3
