Disgust and shame hits me again and I can’t even stop it. I can’t stop myself from slipping into that broken woman again. Memories of my blood soaking into the plush gray carpet of our home flashes behind my eyes, the way he made me scrub it until the chemicals I used burned into my fingers.
Fresh tears well in my eyes again. “I.. I’m sorry.” I whisper, almost ready to choke on the words.
“Louder.”
“I’m sorry.” I say with clear intent.
“There’s a good girl.” He coos, and vomit rolls in my stomach again but I quickly shun it back down, refusing to cause more spills.
Ricky seems pleased with my apology and places the speculum down on a table that’s sitting next to the bed, then he comes to stand at the end of the bed where my feet are buckled together with the same leather straps that are holding my arms down. His stormy eyes glow with a viciousness like I’ve never seen before, and my skin begins to crawl with fear, like a million ants are burrowing into my body.
He places his hands on the leather straps and begins to unbuckle them. “What are you doing?” I ask, fearful of his next move. Everything about Ricky is unpredictable and it leaves me on edge. The room stays silent as he continues to pull the leather straps free, leaving my question in limbo. Once my legs are free, I try to pull them away but he’s so much quicker than me, grabbing my ankles in a vice grip before yanking them into the stirrups that I didn’t even notice he’d lifted up.
I struggle in his hold, doing whatever I can to pull my legs away but it’s useless as they’re quickly fastened down again, my thighsparted open to reveal my most intimate area to him. The look on his face is one of pure evil as he takes in every inch of me, a body that’s littered in wounds and scars, bruises and dirt covering every inch, but that doesn’t seem to deter him. In fact, he looks like a starving beast ready to eat me alive and it makes me sick.
Feather light touches skim over my ankles and I jump at the contact as he trails his fingers up the insides of my calves, curling over my knees until he reaches the apex of my thighs. His touch feels like a blade that’s slicing through my skin and I’ve never been more desperate to crawl away, to tear myownskin off.
Lifting my gaze to meet him, I plead. “Please, don’t do this. I.. I can’t take it anymore. I’m begging you to kill me, just end it now.”
I remember the last time I begged for death, but it never came, like something orsomeonehad me tethered to the earth, refusing to let me go.
“Your pleas mean nothing to me Annabelle, when will you learn that, hm? That whatever you say means nothing to me.You,mean nothing to me, you never have done. You were a debt that needed to be claimed, and I got exactly what I wanted. A good fucking lay, a pussy to keep my dick warm in the mean time.”
His words stab me but it’s not hurt that I feel anymore, at one point I would have cried and poured my heart out at him for hurting me in such a way but now,hiswords mean nothing to me. I was stupid for apologising before, I was stupid for allowing this man into my life, to poison me from the inside out.
Ricky takes a sharp breath before continuing, his fingers digging into my knees.
“There’s no use begging for death because it’ll never come. You’ll live out the rest of your pathetic life in my cage, alongsideyour best friend.”
What?
I feel like I’ve been hit by a bus.
“What do you mean?” I ask with trepidation.
“Oh, don’t tell me you never realised how much of a desperate whore your best friend was?” He says with a dark chuckle, but I can only hear one word.Was,not is.
“You said ‘was’, not ‘is’?”
“Did I? Oops, must have just slipped out. Yeah, that bitch really wanted my cock, badly. It’s a shame what happened to her though, truly.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” I snap out and I can feel my patience wearing thin. He inches his fingers closer to my core but I keep my gaze locked on him, refusing to back down.
“Fuck, you make me hard when you’re all snappy like this.” He groans and I shudder at the sound. “I suppose I better tell you what happened to the poor bitch before I ruin you, it’s the least I can do.”
“How thoughtful of you.” I murmur.
Ricky’s demeanour quickly changes at my remark. “Don’t give me your fucking attitude, I’ll slit your throat right now and bleed you dry, is that what you want?”
“No. It’s not.” I say, backing down for a moment, letting him have his moment.
“Good little wife. Now, onto precious Ellie.”
The sound of her name has tears pricking in the corners of my eyes. The last time I saw her was before the crash, she’d taken me into her arms and whispered in my ear that she’d see me again. I never thought those would be the last words I heard from her. The memory has me grinding my molars together butRicky quickly snaps me out of it when his hand slaps across the burn mark on my thigh.
A sharp yelp spills from my mouth and I quickly bite down on my abused bottom lip to silence myself.
“Good, I’ve got your attention.” He retorts. “There’s one thing that you’ve never asked me in this whole time we’ve had together and I’m quite surprised that it never crossed your mind.”
