“I think you misunderstand. You have made it very clear that you are not made for ballrooms, nor are you made for marriage in the traditional sense?—”
“And yet, even though it appears that you have ears and the capability of understanding me, you are proposing exactly that. Looking to leg-shackle me.”
“I do not—do you not see it? I am seeking to give you freedom. You and I could have a marriage in name only. A business arrangement, if you will.”
“By making me your wife? Making me dependent upon you?”
He shook his head. “You fully misunderstand me, Lady Marianne. I was married. My wife died and left me with a child?—”
“And you are seeking to find somebody who can seamlessly fill the void your wife has left? I know nothing of children, nor do I have any desire to have any of my own.” She surprised herself with the statement because she had never even thought about having children before.
“That is precisely what I do not want,” he said. “I am perfectly capable of raising my child on my own. In fact, my son and I are perfectly content. What I need is someone to function as a wifein public. Those in my life are determined to tell me that I must marry again, that it is necessary. I am certain you saw how the ladies of the ton descended upon me like vultures at the ball, did you not?”
She recalled the scene vividly—Lady Heathcliff throwing out her lures most obviously.
“I would like to put a stop to such things. I would like to attend balls without having to fear that I will not make it past the coat room without somebody setting their cap at me. If I had you as my wife, such things would cease—and they would cease with haste. You, likewise, would not have to contend with your aunt anymore, well-meaning as she might be. You would have a husband, and you would do as you pleased.”
She bit her bottom lip before letting go and feeling the blood run back into it. “And what if the thing I desire most is to return to the solitude of the convent?”
“You may return to the convent if you wish. We can stage a public falling-out, making it clear that our marriage is truly over. You can tell everybody that I was a poor husband who only sought a nursemaid for his child and refused your children of your own, or whatever else you wish to tell people. You can return to your convent as a married woman seeking to escape an unhappy marriage. You would not be the first. I believe, in fact, Saint Catherine’s has a nun who found her way there in just such a way.”
She paused, sitting back. She had never heard that before. Instantly, she took inventory of all the nuns at the convent. Which of them was a highborn lady escaping her husband? Or a gentleman’s wife?
“So do you see? We are more aligned than you might think,” he said, drawing her back to reality.
“You are truly allowing this? You do not want me to give you an heir, to perform as your wife, to be a mother to your son?”
“I would expect you to perform as my wife in public for a few months. Right now, as highborn and newlywed members of high society, there would be much attention on us. If we were to get married, attention would only increase for a time. But they would grow tired of us soon enough. I predict that by the end of the year, everyone will be quite tired of hearing about us. Then we can do as we please. So what do you say?”
She thought about this. This was exactly what she wanted—a husband who expected nothing of her, who would allow her freedom, who would even let her return to the convent. Did she want to go to the convent again? All this time, it had been her dream, but it had been a dream because she wanted to escape marriage. If she had a husband, she could find her peace anywhere she wanted. Yes, she could go back to the convent, but she did not have to stay there. She could travel. She could find any place on earth that would provide her with the same comfort and peace that the convent had provided her.
And she could escape her aunt without having to ruin their relationship.
Suddenly, a thought came to her.
“There is something I shall have to insist upon.”
“Of course,” he said. “Anything.”
“I shall need a lady’s maid. A companion.”
“You do not have a maid now?”
“I share a housemaid with my aunt. I have a friend at the convent. She is utterly unqualified to be a lady’s maid. She does not own a single pair of shoes that was not woven by the nuns. She has never left the convent, has never visited a ballroom, and would not know which fork to use at a fancy dinner.”
His eyebrows rose, and he smirked. “You wish to make a nun your lady’s maid?”
“No. I wish to make my friend Juliet a lady’s maid. She has lived at the convent since she was abandoned there as a small child, and she has no prospects. I would like to bring her here as my lady’s maid. As my companion.”
He sat back, drumming his fingers on his arm. “A lady’s maid with no qualifications or accomplishments, who has never lefta convent in which she has lived for, I presume, twenty odd years?”
“Indeed,” she said. This was a challenge. She only realized that now. If he said no to this, then she would know that he was not serious about his offer at all and would likely take back everything he had promised.
However, to her surprise, he let out a chuckle. “Very well. If you wish to have the most unqualified lady’s maid of all time as your companion, I shall not stand in your way. In fact, I shall arrange an account for you at all the best London dressmakers, hat makers, and whatever else a lady needs, and you may outfit her with appropriate attire.”
She paused. “I shall need a guarantee of a financial nature.”
“It will be in the contract that we will sign. A guaranteed monthly allowance—pin money, as it is called—whether we live together or not.”
