My chest tightens and breathing seems impossible. My mind is a blank space where no thoughts are getting through, because reality can’t be real.
How can they be gone? Is the world still here? I’m still here.
There’s a feminine whisper next to me. “Please don’t hurt them.”
The man in front of me shifts his weight and pistol whips her face. Jenny cries out in pain. Jenny? When did she get here? These fuckers lost my dog, roughed up my cousin and uncle, killed Izzy and Alana, and now they’ve hurt Jenny? From the blank space in my mind all I see is red.
“I’m going to fucking kill you,” I snarl.
But I’m tied up—helpless, useless. And my family is getting picked off one by one. Wake up, Joey. This has to be a hellscape dream. There’s no way it’s real. It’s impossible.
The guy laughs. “You can try, but we’ve got men heading toward the safe house. In ten minutes, your nephew and aunt will be dead too.”
Jenny spits blood in front of her and stares off into space. “Look at the way the blood soaks into the wooden floors. Do you think this is the original wood? The knots and knobs are all where branches used to be, and now it's been filed down to nothing. Life is so fucking weird and temporary. The blood drops landed on the center of the knot. It reminds me of an eye from an anime character… What was his name? The one with the red eyes. There’s a billion characters like that, and they all have great hair. Oh, anime boys, dark, brooding, and great hair. Shit, did I wash my hair today? Wait, that’s right, Joey did. But he didn’t use the shampoo I like. Do I need shampoo? Maybe I should switch to Japanese hair care? Japan and Korea have fantastic hair and skin care products….”
At this point, both men are staring at her. Normally, I can understand what the fuck she’s doing, but now even I’m at a loss.
“What the hell, woman? We said your friends are dead and you’re talking about wood and hair products?” the shorter of the two men snaps.
But the other man punches him in the arm. “Shut up, I want to see the station where this train of thought ends.” He gives her a little nod. “You go right ahead.”
Jenny smiles like her teeth are coated with sugar instead of blood. “Thank you. I figured, since you’re clearly going to kill us, I would let my Narrator Lady talk for a little while. I mean, it’s only fair. I work so hard to keep her quiet, she should get a few minutes to be free before… Well, you know.”
I blink at her a few times, but she doesn’t look at me at all. Instead, she’s locked eyes with the taller guy, who is nodding violently. “You’ve got a narrator too! Mine changes accents depending on what’s happening in my head. When I’m thinking about sex, the Narrator Man sounds like Chef from South Park.”
“Issac Hayes,” The shorter one mumbles.
The taller one counters with annoyance, “No, he sounds like Chef, fuck you. When I’m thinking about fancy science shit, it sounds all British like Hugh Jackman.”
“Jesus fucking Christ, Hugh Jackman is from Australia.”
“Shut up, I don’t criticize your narrator man.”
The shorter one throws up his hands. “I don’t have one!”
Both Jenny and the taller guy gasp and stare with their jaws open. “So, what random thoughts are filling your head all the time?”
The shorter one shrugs and says, “Nothing. It’s a blank wall unless I need to think about something.”
Jenny drops her eyes. “That sounds so lonely. Right now, my Narrator Lady is playing random scenes from The Prestige and Logan.”
Both men pause and nod, but it’s Donny who pipes in. “Great fucking movies.”
“Right!” the short guy says.
Donny says with a sadness in his voice, “My Narrator Dude stopped talking when my meds got upped. I miss him. It’s too quiet now.”
The men whip their attention to Donny, and while my cousin starts babbling about his meds, I notice the pile of clothes start to move.
Wait, are we not alone?
A side door creaks open, and my Aunt Rita comes storming in. As Jenny would say, the vibes instantly change. She’s a snarling beast complete with fur coat and diamonds around her neck like trophies of her kills. She scowls. “What the hell are they still doing alive?”
“Um, we were talking about narrators in our head,” the taller one says, “and movies.”
She locks eyes with me and yanks the gun out of the shorter one’s hand. “Your mother and father didn’t take this long to die here.” She points to a dark patch of wood in the center of the room. “They left one hell of a stain, though. I didn’t even bother to clean it, just left them to rot.”
Before I can react, my girlfriend says, “Ohhhh. That’s why this place is haunted. Or was it already haunted and you made it worse?” Jenny glances over to the tall one. “Haunting is a hyperfixation.”
