“Stop with thewhat ifs, Ava. Because at this point, you’ll just drive yourself crazy.”
My throat thickens with all the unspokenwhat ifs.Because it’s seven o’clock at night and I haven’t even heard from him today.
“But… what if he’s done with me?”
Regan cackles as if it’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever said. “Right. Ava, he’s your soulmate.”
“Some soulmate,” I whisper. “I haven’t seen him since he left the apartment last night. I expected him to call or maybe show up at work or, I don’t know, run in the front door having remembered everything.” The tears begin to fall. “It’s been complete radio silence.”
“He needs time to process everything,” Maddie says. “Put yourself in his shoes. Imagine waking up and not knowing who you are. And then, while you’re trying to piece everything together, people you don’t remember keep trying to tell you who you’re supposed to be, bombarding you with things like you’re a doctor and you were injured by a bomb serving in the military and you’re married and here is the wife you’re supposed to love and the parents you don’t know.”
“I know, I know. I’ve tried to look at it from his point of view, and he did try to explain it to me out at the tree. It’s just…” I rub my stomach. “What will happen to me, tous, if he never remembers?”
“He will,” Regan says. “Even if he doesn’t right now. On some level, in his subconscious, I believe he will know you and things will work out.”
My phone pings with a text and I heave a sigh of relief when I check it. I look at my friends. “It’s him.”
914-555-5879
Ava, it’s Trevor. This is my new phone. Can we meet?
My heart pounds. Has he remembered?
I quickly show the text to Maddie and Regan. “What are you waiting for?” Regan says, waving me off. “Go!”
I add him to my contacts and then respond.
Me
Of course. Where?
Trevor
How about a cup of coffee?
Me
Sure. I’ll meet you there shortly.
I excitedly hop off the bench. The shop is closed, but I don’t care. It’ll be better that way, us there alone without anyone interrupting. And what good is owning your own coffee shop if you can’t open it for whoever you want, whenever you want?
But then I reread his text, and my stomach twists into a knot. He’s asking to meet for coffee. That’s definitely not a request from a man who just remembered who he is. He’d have asked where I was so that he could rush to me and sweep me into his arms and twirl me around because he knows how much he loves me and how much I love him and how much we’ve loved each other since we were thirteen.
Better yet, he’d have known where I was. Healwaysknew where I was at seven pm on Tuesdays. He’d have simply shown up, his amazing blue eyes staring at me just how they used to. With a smile that would let me know even before we said a single word that he’d remembered. That it had all come back to him. Every second of our incredible life together.
My steps slow when I realize none of that is going to happen, my entire body one bundle of tightly coiled nerves as I make the walk to the shop.
I unlock the front door, turn on one light behind the counter, and leave the CLOSED sign on. For the next few minutes, I try to calm down by making Trevor’s favorite drink: an iced caramelmacchiato. But my mind keeps racing. He’s had all day to contact me, and hasn’t. Has he been trying to work up the nerve to tell me what he wants to tell me? That he doesn’t want to see me? Be around me? My body stiffens. That he doesn’t see the point of being with me if he can’t remember.
Or is he going to say he feels guilty about parting the way we did last night? That he wants to stay with me in our apartment. Fall back into whatever routine we’re supposed to be in.
That he wants to try.
It’s the last thought I’m clinging to when the door chime sounds.
Trevor steps through. Before he looks at me, he does a visual sweep of the entire coffee house. Is he imploring himself to remember? How many times has he done the very same thing over the past week?
When his gaze finally lands on me, there’s no spark of recognition. No visceral reaction. Just a cordial smile and lift of his chin. He might as well be meeting his sister, not his wife. Not the woman he pledged eternal love to.
