“I know it.”
“Maverick, I can’t…talk about this right now. I’m not thereyet.”
“That’s okay, darlin’. I understand.” I give her hand asqueeze. “You take as much time as you need. Whatever you decideI’ll support you.”
Shelooks at me, chin quivering. “Thank you, Maverick.”
“You’re welcome, sweetheart. I know this isn’t easy for you.”I take her in my arms. We’re almost at her house. “Just…relax. Whatis meant to be is meant to be, darlin’. I truly believe that. Godwill help you find the way. You just have to pay attention isall.”
Shegives me a tight smile and releases me. As we reach her house, Igive her another little hug. “I’ll see you tomorrownight?”
“Certainly. How about you pick me up at six?”
“On the dot.” I nod, and then I give her a tiny kiss on thecheek, because I don’t want her to feel put out by kissing herlips. She’s got a lot on her mind and the last thing that she needsto worry about is me coming on to her. Not like I would, becausethere’s always been a time and a place for us, and now is not it,but still. “See you then.”
“Yeah. See you.”
I watchher pull away before I make my exit. The sonogram picture is in myback pocket. I take it out and take a picture of it, saving it tomy phone, and I go one step further, making it my wallpaper. “Howabout that.” I murmur to myself, pleased and proud.
…and I smile.
***
Ellie
I neverpictured Maverick as a softie, but he kind of suits it. Here Ithought he was the rugged, tough guy, but deep down, he’s not.Well, he may be like that in bed, but he sure is pulling out allthe stops for me. Can’t help but wonder how much he’s going to hateme if I decide to give the baby up. He’s the kind of guy I can seemyself being friends with. Instead of me taking care of him, like Ialways had to do with Will, he’s taking care of me. It’s…nice…for achange. He insists on making sure that I’m fed, and that’ssweet.
Funnything is, I don’t mind being around him. I figured he’d make myskin crawl. And he’s not being overly sweet or syrupy, either.Which I like. As I get through the day, I find myself thinkingabout him, and I pull the ultrasound picture out of my purse.Studying it, I draw in a deep breath, remembering how strong thatheartbeat was. “God, you’re going to hate me, kid.” I say tomyself. “I’m not cut out to be one of them maternal types. Yourdaddy sure is, though.” A sigh. “Tell me what to do, kid. Tell meif you want me to be your mama, or if you want me to pass on doornumber one and give you to someone way more qualified.”
That’s when I decide that I can’t have an abortion. I just…Ican’t. I mean, I’mtalkingto the kid. How could I ever…do that now? That’sa living, breathing thing inside my body. God, I can’t even step ona spider, I have to direct it onto a piece of paper and toss itoutside. And to think I can pull off having an abortion? No. “Well,thanks, kid. Y’all helped me make half this decision. Now for theother half.”
Sixo’clock comes so fast I don’t even realize what time it is until Iget Maverick’s text, saying that he’s up the street, and he asks ifI want him to come in or to meet him outside. I tell him thelatter, not wanting to blur that boundary, and I grab my purse,before locking up and meeting him outside. He hops out of his truckand opens the passenger side door for me. “How are ya,sugar?”
“I’m…good.” I tell him. And I check myself. I am good. It’snot a lie. “How are you?”
“Great, love. Better since I’m with you and not with mybrothers.” He scoffs a laugh. “Been a day, I tell ya.”
“Yeah? How’s Gunner?”
“He’s good. I took him out for ice cream, like I used to whenhe was a kid. He’s got some fessing up to do with my mama. He quitschool.”
“Yea, he was saying when he was all drugged up,remember?”
“Oh, yeah, that’s right. Anyway, he’s got to tell mama, so sheknows not to hire another ranch hand come the fall.”
“You think he will?”
“I think it’s irrelevant. She knows. But the longer he leavesit before he owns up to it, the more mama’s going to come down onhim when he does.”
“Does he know that she knows?”
“It’s like the pink elephant in the room, but, yeah. This isthe way that this family plays, you know. We all assume that mamaknows everything, which she does, all the time, but she lets uscome to her with the truth, on our own time, and then we sit downas a family and decide what to do about it.”
“Did you have any indication that Gunner was flunkingout?”
“Gunner went away to college for all the wrong reasons. Heleft after daddy died. Ran, really. He’s only been gone since thefall. If he’d a stayed home and dealt with things, he wouldn’t havedug himself into this mess at all. Kinda like the way Blake handleddaddy’s death. Me, Zack and Austin were the only three that weredigging in and dealing with things. I don’t believe inpussy-footing around your problems, you know? I believe in dealingwith them head on. That’s how I roll.”
“Me too. This is the only instance where I’m sort ofpussy-footing around. Never done that before. Hell, even when Iknew my marriage was going south, I gave my ex the whatfor.”
