Carefully, he manoeuvered his bulk until he sat on the side of the bed, his broad back to me. My fingers twitched, but I didn’t reach out, no matter how much I wanted to. I doubted he believed my fake sleep routine, though. Cold curled in my belly. I’d thought after the past week or so of us sharing his bed and him being more a part of our lives, that he would trust me. I wasn’t stupid; I knew that trust for someone like Bal was hard to give, and that I had to earn it, but that worked both ways. I’d been burned enough for me to be suspicious of most people. The only person I trusted implicitly was Sor. And she trusted Bal, so I was trying my hardest to live by her example and wait for him to give us more.
I blinked hard before I groaned and pretended a sleepy awakening. “Hey, you okay?” My voice was rough enough to feign being sleep-heavy. Slowly, I slipped my arms around his waist and leaned my cheek on his solid back, rubbing my scruff against his soft skin. He held my hands to his stomach, his tense body relaxing, but it felt almost forced. “I’m fine, just struggling to relax. Go back to sleep.”
It was an effort to not call him out on the lie. My wolf’s senses were not dulled by being a vampire, and the sourness of untruth seeped up my nose. My ability to sniff out a lie was something I thought Bal sometimes forgot. “Are you sure?” I laid a kiss between his shoulder blades, pushing away my need to confront his lie and demand he tell me what he was really doing.
I’d promised Sor I’d give Bal a chance to adjust to having us in his life. Hell, I needed to acclimate to our polyamorous situation, too. He wasn’t used to explaining himself to anyone, and I understood that. I wasn’t either. I hid my disappointment at his untruth with another kiss, running my tongue up his spine and nipping the back of his neck. His gravelly moan shot straight to my cock. It was such an honest sound, one I hadn’t heard before, that I did it again. Perhaps, Sor was right, I just neededto use a more subtle way of inserting myself into his heart and mind. He’d trust me eventually…
It wasthe early hours a nearly ten days later when I held Sor’s hand and we walked through the gardens, making our way to the stables. Silver moonlight illuminated the manicured lawns, leaving deep shadows in a colourless world. It made the rose blooms colourless and ethereal. We weren’t rushing, but I’d chosen to lead us out of a side door in between the rounds of the castle guards so we could avoid being seen and spoiling our surprise. It was easy for me to pinpoint their location around the estate purely by scent. My wolfish senses had increased tenfold since I’d gone through bloodlust.
After a fast walk across the lawns and through the hedged gardens, the strong scent of the stables assaulted my nose. I hid my distaste. Horses weren’t something I’d ever had a lot to do with, and when I did, we were always wary of each other. Learning to ride, when my wolf could run just as fast and was equally as agile, wasn’t worth the stress to them or me, not when I was a predator and they were prey. But Sor wanted to track Bal down and play the same kind of seduction game with him as they often did with me.
My dick twitched, and it was hard to keep it under control at the thought of being the one to decide how his pleasure went. Sor, sweet and compliant with both of us, was captivating and a sight I always craved, but dominance in our relationship wasn’t something I needed, not anymore. Yet, seeing a vampire as powerful as Balthazar Rossi pliant just for us? It was like a shot of adrenaline in my bloodstream, one that nearly brought me to my knees.
It had been three days since Bal had gone back to London to run his court, or whatever he liked to call it, and I knew he enjoyed riding when he returned to the castle, especially at night. The stables were where we’d find him. I’d seen him talking to the new stable boy and the stable master a few times from our bedroom window when the moon was high, but they weren’t around at this hour. Most vampires were winding down, ready to sleep. It was their equivalent of an evening time, especially younger vamps who couldn’t go out in the sun.
“What do you think he’s doing?” Sor’s question was quiet, her voice tight. “He came back from his ride over an hour ago.”
“I don’t know, baby.” I waggled my brows, trying to lighten her worry. “But don’t you think we should find out? We can have hot sex in the stables like in one of your regency romances.”
Sor hit my arm. “Don’t be ridiculous. It’s past four. The sun will be up soon, and the daytime stablehands always come and sort the horses in the early morning before it gets too hot. I don’t want any of them seeing my bare bum and boobs.”
I laughed at her indignant expression, waggling my brows. “Aw, come on, little bird. We could make it far more fun than what’s between those pages. For a start, there are three of us. And with the thrill of being caught…”
Her giggle lifted my heart. “Like I said, you’re ridiculous.”
I sped up, hoping to catch Bal in his tight riding gear. I’d had a fantasy of stripping him out of it for weeks, ever since I very first saw him wear those tight jodhpurs. They hugged his arse like nothing else. I smirked to myself, hoping he’d be wearing them tonight. Would he let us take the lead this time? He hadn’t so far, but neither had we asked.
I pushed away the niggling doubts I still had about him. He’d been attentive to us in his own way, though I still felt like he was hiding something. Especially when he continued to disappear from our bed without saying a word, or even mentioning it later.At least when he was at the castle, he spent more time with us. He’d helped Sor practice some of the spells we’d found in the books, ones that were related to the different elements. Yet, even when he was gentle and considerate, there was something in his eyes—a kind of sadness that I didn’t understand. He was still holding himself back, but I got it. I was, too. The thing was, I’d already decided I was in for the long haul, and I was willing to give him as long as he needed. One day, he’d trust me, and there was no way I’d rush him, not when I was still learning to trust him, too.
I was glad we had Sor’s heritage to concentrate on. He hadn’t let either of us return to the Gambit, and, although part of me loved his protectiveness, I was also pissed that he didn’t believe I could look after myself or Sor. I wasn’t used to doing nothing. I liked to be useful, so I filled my time training with the guards, reading about vampire lore, and helping Sor learn all she could about witchcraft from the books in the library that were in English. They weren’t the oldest ones, but those were in Latin, or some other language that neither of us understood. Bal said he’d help us with them, but wanted us to leave them to one side until we’d exhausted the newer, less delicate books. Some were stunning antiques and even had family trees etched into the leather, and were from so long ago that the old pages were yellowed and delicate. We’d put on gloves and tried our very best to be careful with them if we needed to move them.
Sor spent hours learning about the different witch covens. Most were elementals of some kind, like earth, air, fire, and water witches, but Sor had no idea what her powers were. I’d noticed before that the air around her became icy cold when she was upset or stressed, and that ice crystals covered her fingertips, so we’d decided to look into that, and maybe the possibility that she was a water witch.
She’d found a book of incantations and had managed to make a bowl of water ripple, but that was as far as we’d gotten. I knew Sor was frustrated by her lack of progress, but I was happier than I’d ever been. Even my wolf was content. It scared me when I knew a monster lurked beneath my skin. Only my lovers’ blood and touch kept it at bay, and when Bal disappeared, this time for days, my skin itched with the intense need to find him.
“You know it’s probably nothing, right? He loves to ride; he’s probably just relaxing.” But that feeling of distrust in my gut had been getting steadily worse.
Sor huffed a laugh. “Relaxing? Him?”
Her levity forced an answering chuckle from me. “Okay, as much as he ever does, then. Maybe it’s this war. It’s probably escalating, and he needs a bit of space from everyone to think.”
“The war’s been getting worse for years. I heard the guards talking with Vito, and he said they have to go to Europe soon. Something to do with the vampire king’s son going missing, and an important package they have to deliver to the king.”
I frowned. That feeling in my gut was only getting worse. “A package? Bal hasn’t mentioned anything. Never mind; I guess he'll tell us when he’s ready.” Despite my words, my confidence in him was deteriorating. The thread of hurt that, once again, others knew things I didn’t, got worse, and I had to force a nonchalant shrug. “I suppose if Bal is King Stefan’s general, he’d have to go and see what can be done to locate the boy. Maybe the Mades have him?”
Sor’s brows pinched. “I hope not. Gods, I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy, never mind a young boy.”
“He’s not that young. About fourteen, isn’t he?”
“That’s terribly young for a vampire. Besides, I think he’s a bit younger than that. And he’s probably been sheltered all his life. Being a prisoner of Made vampires, while your father iswaging a war against them, would be a horrible position for him to be in. He’ll be used as a pawn in a war that he’s had nothing to do with.”
I agreed, privately hoping that maybe the boy had run away. He must have been kept in a gilded prison all his life, with an ailing and slightly crazy father who was at war with his own kind. The poor boy probably never got to have any fun, like playing with his friends or riding, like that stable boy.
We got closer to the stables, and Sor’s body stiffened as if she was preparing herself for something bad.
“Something feels wrong.” Ice crystals sparkled in the air around us.
I squeezed her shoulders, trying to alleviate her anxiety. It was unusual for her to worry more than I did about what Bal was doing. But she was right. There was an ominous feel to the night. “Don’t worry, Sor, he's got a lot on his mind. He probably just needs some alone time.” My words felt like a lie even though I wanted to believe them.
