Another backwards.
I shook my head, my cheeks burning. I wanted that image of them both with me to be real so badly, my insides ached, but… It hit me like a smack in the face. My eyes narrowed on his face, and I cocked my head. Was that it? Payment for betraying his trust? He wanted me to service both of them at the same time. The fact that I wanted to would just be a bonus to him, no fighting or screaming. Not that it would do me much good. I’d learned that a long time ago.
Gentle fingers grasped my neck under my chin, tilting my head to expose my neck. “Shane is in lust, little one; he’d enjoy fucking you.”
Coldness washed through every part of me, all traces of desire disappearing at his words. “So that’s what you want from me. To give my body to you both.” My voice was dead. It wasn’t a question, it was a realisation. But I’d survived this kind of thing before, and I could do it again. Then I’d take my stuff and run.
He growled and stepped back so quickly, I almost fell. I slapped my palms against the wall behind and waited tensely for him to grab me or guide me up the stairs. I felt the heavy weight of his gaze, but didn’t move, my attention fixed once again on the buttons of his silk shirt.
“Go to bed, Sorcha.” The tightness in his voice was hard to miss. “And don’t presume you ever know anything about me orwhat I want. I have many reasons for my actions, and none of them will ever be obvious to a mere mortal like you.”
My head snapped up. “What? So you don’t want me to sleep with you both?”
“It’s called fucking, Sorcha. Say what you mean, and there is very little sleeping involved when I take anyone to my bed, or anywhere else I choose to fuck them, for that matter. But no. I don’t fuck humans. They are too breakable.”
Heat immediately swamped my face. Of course, he didn’t. How stupid was I? What the hell would someone like him want with me? A used blood and sex slave. Mortified, I kept my gaze and face lowered. “So you just want me for Shane?”
He muttered something under his breath, but having mortal hearing, I didn’t catch it.
“Like I said, Sorcha. Go to bed. I do not expect anything from you. You are here because I knew how much it would piss Nikolai off to lose one of his investments. He is a snake and needs to be reminded occasionally which of us is more powerful. I want nothing in return, except for you to stay as part of my household. Shane will need a friend, and I would imagine something more at times. I will not always be here. If you find him attractive, it’s up to you both if you act on that or not. I have no feelings on it either way. But until I say otherwise, you stay away from him. He’s dangerous at the moment and is not the man you have come to know.”
I kept my head lowered, not wanting him to see my tears. He’d made his point. The desire that had heated the air before must have been a figment of my overactive imagination. I was beneath the great Balthazar Rossi. Not so much that I didn’t have my use, which was to keep Shane company, but reminding me I wasn’t even good enough for him to… Say what you mean, Sorcha, isn’t that what he said? Fuck, then. I wasn’t good enough to fuck. Yeah, that was enough to destroy any self-confidence I’dgained working in his damned club, or even while I’d spent time with Shane and him.
I felt his gaze on me and saw his fingers flex and open a few times before he turned away. I didn’t move until his footsteps had faded. Exhaustion hit me. It took a few minutes to get back to my room, and when I did, I fell face-first onto the bed and let my brain shut down. No matter the Count’s warning, I’d make sure Shane was okay. I knew he’d never hurt me. Then I’d leave.
I ignored the tightness in my chest at the thought of deserting Shane. I’d miss him so much. He’d been the only person in my life that I could remember being genuine with me. He’d never had an agenda, never hurt or yelled at me, only ever been kind, and as supportive to me as I’d tried to be to him. But I’d had enough of being treated like the dirt on every vampire’s boot. I was grateful to the Count for getting me away from Nikolai, but it was time to leave and make my own way in this fucked up world. I huffed a smile at being able to actually swear.
“Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck…” I mumbled as I fell into a deep, exhausted slumber.
5
Shane
Awareness slowly filteredinto my brain. Beneath my head was a soft pillow. A sheet rested over my legs, its material smooth and light, and a cool breeze smelling faintly of pine caressed my hot and overly sensitive skin. Pain throbbed in my wrists, and an enticing yet salty taste lingered in my mouth, one that matched seamlessly with the decadent and alluring male scent that enveloped me.
“Fuck…” I mumbled between dry lips. My breathing quickened, and my eyes snapped open. It was his scent. His blood. He was what I could taste. And, gods, could I taste him. It was the best thing I’d ever had in my mouth. Even now, I wanted more...of his blood, the feel of his hands on my skin, his power washing over me. That whole thought pathway sent a wave of confusion through me. I’d never even considered being with a male, and now I had no clue what that meant. Everything about him touching me, feeding me, even tying me down and taking control, had turned me on to the point I couldn’t thinkof anything else. I’d needed his blood as much as my body had needed his touch. Mother wolf, dammit! My mind was hazy, but I was sure it had been days of feeding and orgasms. He’d utterly taken control. Even my wolf had obeyed his every command; it was as if a switch had been flipped in my head, and he was my entire focus.
I had no issues with male-on-male; it just wasn’t something I’d ever considered for myself. My brows drew down as I tried to pinpoint why not. After all, I’d enjoyed sex with women. I’d had a harem of females willing to answer when I called, but nothing had ever affected me like his touch had. Even now, my cock jumped, standing to attention, and tenting the lightweight sheet.
I stared at my body’s reaction, replaying the details of what had happened in the last few days. Was it a few days? I rubbed my face and exhaled heavily. I had no idea how much time had passed, not that it mattered. My quick glance around the room confirmed that it was empty. My tense muscles released a little. I needed time to think, to understand what was happening to me and what it meant. Except, I really didn’t. I was a fucking vampire, that’s what. I wasn’t so naive as to think all this was anything else. Now, I needed to understand what being a Made truly meant.
My stomach rumbled loudly, interrupting my thoughts. I was so damned hungry, I might start chewing the sheets soon. My heart thundered and my palms sweated as I remembered the hunger that had slammed into me at the party. I could only describe it as a rage, a need so desperate that I would have killed anyone in my path. I swallowed my disgust. I’d tried to get to Rawson...to use him for blood! Fuck, I could have killed him! Coldness settled in my chest. I sat right forward and rubbed at it, for all the good it did. And what about the desperate sexual need that had accompanied the first taste of the Count’s blood?
Running a trembling hand over my face didn’t erase that memory. That red elixir had been the most delicious thing I’d ever tasted, until it heated every cell in my body into an inferno of lust. I’d literally felt like I’d go mad if I didn’t get relief, my body wound so tight I’d wanted to explode. Desire rolled through me again, and I groaned, unable to stop my thoughts being consumed by memories of the Count’s stunning face, his honed body, and those damned talented hands of his.
“Fuck me!” I fisted my cock and jerked it, picturing his face and the look on it as he played with my body, even though I had no idea why he turned me on so much.
My wolf rumbled deep inside me, broadcasting his need to hunt, to kill. He was hungry for the Count’s blood. He’d always been a headstrong presence in my mind, but right now, all he wanted was to sink his fangs into that warm, blood-filled skin and vicariously enjoy the pleasure I felt as I fucked the Count’s fist.
That wasn’t good, like, at all. He wanted more of the midnight scent and the powerful presence that had kept him, and me, in check last night. It was the only one that had ever been able to control him. I felt his need for that kind of partner. He was as lost as I was now that he could no longer become a wolf and run free. At least, we hadn’t been able to shift—not since—them.
I’d felt his submission to the Count, along with mine. For us both, it came with a strange sense of relief. Not one of my previous sexual partners had ever come close to being our equal in power, and, though I’d thought my wolf would hate that kind of dynamic, he now craved it. His need to push, to find our limits and see if together we could manipulate, maybe even one day dominate, such a commanding soul was something that left me shocked, yet with a strange excitement bubbling in my gut.
Taking a steady breath, I tried to push him back a little. I didn’t want to fight with him, but I couldn’t let him take control until I knew I wouldn’t hurt anyone, namely Sorcha. She was in the castle somewhere. I could scent her on the breeze. Part of me rejoiced that the Count hadn’t sent her away, part of me was furious at him for putting her at risk while I was in this unpredictable state. She’d already been terribly abused by the vampire she’d thought was to be her loving husband, only to find out he was nothing of the sort. She’d been a slave, pure and simple. Yet, as awful as her life had been, she’d survived that abuse, just as I had all the shit that had been thrown my way. I never wanted to hurt her. And I wasn’t stupid enough to think this was over.
I studied my thin forearms and shoved the sheet back, panic gripping me. My legs were just the same; my muscle mass had disappeared. My body was eating itself as it morphed into whatever monster I was becoming. My breathing quickened, pins and needles tingling in my fingers. Darkness threatened the edge of my vision. Shit! Come on, Shane, you can beat this. It isn’t your first rodeo on the shit show of life. First, you survive. Then you get even.
I took a deep breath in. Then out. “One.” I held onto another breath as long as I could before I exhaled. “Two.” In...Out…
