Peter gestured for Theo to sit.“While you eat.”
Theo’s stomach rumbled on cue, and he finally sat down.He surveyed the yogurt and berries, finding them to his satisfaction.He heaped two tablespoons of granola on top, then mixed everything up, one eye still on Peter.
Peter crossed and recrossed his legs before he spoke.“I thought we could take a walk through the park a little after sunset, find a quiet spot for some alone time, and wait for Bernard to show himself.I’d not let him near you, of course, but I can’t guarantee I’ll be quick enough to rip out his voice box before he manages to speak.”
“Say what?”Theo’s eyebrows crept up toward his hairline.“Thatis your plan?”
Peter shrugged.“I find that, where a simple solution will do, a complicated approach will only lead to frustration.”
“Wow.You get that from a fortune cookie?”
Peter slurped some coffee and gave Theo a wide grin.
“Oh, fine, Confucius, but in that…in that dream last night, Bernard said he wanted me to come back to him, and I told you already I was okay with playing bait.I mean, I was about to storm out of here last night.You could just lift your compulsion, and—”
“Absolutely not.Theodore, dearest, you have seen enough horror movies to know that running off on your lonesome never leads to the desired outcome.We’re not going to do that.We’re going to do this right, just like that plucky vampire hunter girl from the television show in the ’90s.”
Theo snorted.“Wow.You really are old.”
Peter raised a brow.“Begging your pardon?”
“Nothing.You’re suggesting running off for some sexy times.That’ll also get you killed in the movies.”
Peter’s grin widened.“Theo, my darling ingenue, don’t forget that I’m the monster here.It makes you…oh.I think it makes you a monsterfucker, Theodore.”
“Holy shit, Batman.I’ve seen monsters, and you’re not one.Why won’t you ask the witch for help?”
“Monster-hood is a matter of perspective.I’m Bernard’s monster even if he doesn’t know it yet.We don’t need Sage for this, trust me.For one thing, Sage owns no appropriate footwear for an outdoor excursion, for another, he took a long time learning stranger danger, and for a third, he’d bring the pup.And bringing the pup would only complicate matters, since someone would have to look after him.While also looking after Sage, who only owns flip-flops.It’s why I don’t have pets, you see.”
Theo’s expression was a storm of emotion.Peter found himself wanting to hug him close, but he wasn’t sure it would be appreciated, wasn’t sure whether it would lead to fury or fear.
“Okay, fine.I trust you.We take a fucking walk in the park and hope Bernard’ll show his face.If he does, you kick his ass.Then what?”
Peter cleared his throat and leaned forward.“About that last part.When you say ass kicking, understand I have planned something more along the lines of… Let’s call it convening with worms.”
“Huh?”
“Underground.I shall make him convene with worms underground.”
Theo’s jaw dropped and his eyes went wide.“You want to go andmurderBernard?Assuming you can?”
Peter still wanted his twenty to fifty minutes of gratuitous torture, but apparently vampires begging to be in a relationship could not be choosy assassins.Too bad.
“Yes.Yes, I shall end him.Quickly?”Peter made the last word a question, just in case Theodore saw some flexibility there.
“But…you can’t just… What if…”
Peter barely stopped himself from pouting.Fine.No torture for me this time.The cruelties that befall the soon-to-be handfasted!
“I can be discreet about murdering him.It’ll be fine.You have nothing to worry about.”
“And…and the body?No, wait, fuck.What am I even saying?I can’t be plotting a murder.”Theo ran his hands through his hair and pulled on the strands.“Don’t tell me about the body.”
He looks adorable planning murder, I must say.“Quite right.No planning murder for you.You’re just bait.I will handle the rest of it.”
Theo looked up, hope lapping at those sparkling jade green eyes.“He’d be gone.”
“Hewillbe gone.”
