Please leave me alone.
Austin
I just want to talk. Come on baby
When Austin and I first started going out, I was so excited the most popular boy in our grade wanted to be with me that I somehow ended up letting him call mebabyfor the next eight and a half years. Now, five months post-breakup, I should be able to tell him the truth. I wish it were that easy for me.
I type out a message, thinking of Callie’s words two weeks ago, when Austin last texted me. He doesn’t get to keep popping back into my life and refusing to let me moveon whenhe’sthe one who cheated onme. It feels good to type the message, but as soon as I read through it, I erase it all. They’re not my words, so I rewrite the text and hit send.
Me
I don’t want to talk. I’m trying to move on. Please stop calling.
Naturally, that makes him call again.What is wrong with this man?
I decline the call and then block his number. I don’t know why it took me this long to finally do it. Maybe I needed some liquid courage. Either way, I feel lighter now.
Eager to ride this wave, I take a big gulp of my drink. And another.And another. Fifteen minutes later, my third drink of the night is gone, and it’s working. I’m floating on a cloud.
Things with Austin felt off for a long time before we finally broke up. I couldn’t express my feelings to him, and I pushed my own needs to the backburner to keep him happy. Even so, it hurts to end a long-term relationship. It aches to know that after everything I sacrificed, I wasn’t enough. He still cheated on me.
I thought I’d been doing a good job of moving on, but when you’re constantly running into your ex at the grocery store or the local diner, it becomes notably harder. It doesn’t help that every few weeks he likes to call to try to make amends, as if he senses when I’m starting to move on.
I’d like to think I could deal with Austin today if I weren’t already having a nightmare of a week. Three days ago, I reviewed the books for my family’s ranch and realized Copper Hill is at the end of its rope. Then, my dad wound up in the hospital. He spent two nights there and when wefinally got him home this morning, my ex reappears after almost two weeks of silence.
As the alcohol courses through my veins, the pain lessens. I feel more empowered.I don’t need him.It may have been comforting to have Austin’s support with the ranch, but I can handle it on my own. I can do itallalone. I’ll do it better. I’ll fix the ranch and fix my dad, and everything is going to be great. I just need to buckle down.
When Jax comes back to check on me, I ask him to refill my drink.
“How about I drive you home instead?”
“I’m good. I just want one more. There’s nothing wrong with that.”
He crosses his arms. “I can’t in good conscience serve you another.”
“Then please just leave me alone.”
He stands there for a moment like he’s going to argue with me, but finally releases a breath and storms off.
I’m watching him whisper to the other bartenders, probably telling them not to serve me, when a firm hand lands on my shoulder.
As I spin around to greet my new friend, the room tilts.
“Baby, you have to hear me out. I’ve given you your space, but it’s time we get this sorted out. Youneedme.”
Austin’s words turn my earlier joy into pure rage, but instead of standing up to him, I sputter. “I…what? What do you mean?”
“Look at you.” He thrusts his hands out, as if my mere existence is explanation enough. “You’re pathetic without me, going to the bar by yourself. You and I both know the ranch isn’t going to hold itself up. You need me.”
People watch us as Austin raises his voice, and I scoot out of my barstool to face him. “Go home, Austin.”
He grabs hold of me, and I try to pull back, but his grip is tight. The stench of alcohol wafts off him.
“Austin, let go.” My voice waivers.
“No. I came here to talk with you.” He shoves me back into my seat, but our combined alcohol consumption quickly turns everything into a complete mess. My butt clips the edge of the barstool, and I fall to the floor.
When he reaches down to help drag me up, I pull away. “Ow! No, Austin. That hurts.”
