When we’re back in the room, I set my purse down on the desk in the corner and rifle through my suitcase for my toiletry bag. “Do you want me to do my skincare routine for you tonight?”
Jax doesn’t even look up from his suitcase. “No, that’s okay. It’d take too long. Let’s just go to bed.”
I try to hide my disappointment as I head to the bathroom. He’s completely shut down.
By the time I head back into the bedroom, Jax is already changed into a plain white T-shirt and plaid pajama pants. He wordlessly passes me into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.
He takes what feels like an eternity. It’s probably only a few minutes, but it’s long enough for me to convince myself whatever vibes I felt tonight were in my own head. I’ve been stupid to think we could become something. I’ve been down this path before. When we first met, I thought there was a spark between us, but he watched Austin swoop into my life, and he practically swooped right out of it.
When he draws the covers back on his side of the bed and slips underneath them, I go rigid. I’m too aware of his warmth and the muscles I know are barely hidden by that shirt he’s wearing. I can’t stop thinking of every tender and beautiful moment we shared tonight and how they’ve suddenly melted away.
He flicks the light off on his side of the bed, and the room goes dark. “Good night, Freckles.”
He’s so close. His words are so soft. Chills spread across my arms even though his presence makes me feel hot enough to start a fire.
“Night.”
“Sleep tight.”
I lie there thinking about the way he flirted, the cheeky smirks he gave me, and the feeling of his toned muscles under my hands as we danced. My heart sticks on the way he looked out for me when I stepped out to take my call and how he gave me his jacket and checked on me throughoutthe concert to make sure I was having a good time.That can’t mean nothing.
His breathing quickly deepens as he drifts off to sleep. How on earth do men do that? It takes me ages to fall asleepon a good day.
I continue trying to piece tonight together, desperate to make sense of everything that happened from the good to the bad moments. Then Jax rolls over, tossing an arm out and draping it over me, making my heart stop beating in my chest.
His breathing is slow and even, telling me he has no clue what he’s doing right now. I should move, but being wrapped up in Jax’s arms feels too perfect, like it’s exactly where I should be right now. I barely let myself breathe, out of fear that he’ll wake up.
As I relax into his touch, my mind quiets. I’m not thinking about my dad, Charlie’s warnings, Jax’s reputation, or all the things I have to do for the conference tomorrow and the ranch when I get home. I just have one thought resting in my mind as I drift into a deep sleep:I’m falling for Jax Greer.
Chapter Eighteen
Jax
I feel better restedthan I ever have. I’m warm, comfortable, at peace, and—wait,is that Lauren’s honey shampoo I smell?
I register smooth skin under my fingertips and the soft warmth pressed against my entire body before I open my eyes to find a mop of golden hair below my nose. I’ve somehow slipped my arm around Lauren and pulled her in to be little spoon. If I wasn’t terrified of her waking up and finding us like this, I’d be over the moon. Holding Lauren feels right. I remain frozen in place, listening to her rhythmic breathing, which grounds me, even after my spiral last night.
I can’t be upset with Charlie for saying I don’t commit. It’s true. I’ve never committed to a woman, and for good reason, but hearing him say the words brings out the side of me that wants to prove him wrong. I’ll show him. I can commit. Iwantto commit. Hell, I even think I’mreadyto commit, especially to Lauren, the girl I’ve been in love withfor so long, and who I’ve only fallen harder for over the last few weeks.
As Lauren gently blows puffs of air out her nose, I fill with a greater resolve to prove myself. I’ll show her I’m capable of committing, that I’m worthy. I’m not exactly sure how I’m going to do that, but she needs to know I’m a good man who’s willing to give her the world.
When she stirs, I quickly draw my arm back. I’d like to think I’m successful in doing it without her noticing because she doesn’t say anything to indicate she’s displeased. She just turns to me with half-shut eyes and a dopey smile that puts one on my face too. “Good morning.” Her voice is gravelly. “What time is it?”
I glance at the clock. “Almost six thirty.”
“No!” She shoots up. “My alarm didn’t go off. I’m supposed to be getting ready. I have to meet with that rancher for breakfast soon.”
I grab a hold of her shoulders and pull her back toward me, wrapping her up in my arms. I could get in my head about how this might be crossing a line, but I’m much more concerned with the look of panic on Lauren’s face.
“Take a few deep breaths. You’re going to make it on time to that breakfast, and you’re going to knock his socks off to the point that he shares every single secret about regenerative ranching with you. I know it.”
Her shoulders slowly lower, and she turns back to me, gifting me a smile. It’s half-hearted, but it’s something. “You think so?”
“I know so. Can I do anything to help you get ready on time?”
“Stay out of my way?”
“I can do that. That’s what I’m here for this weekend.”
