I pull away for only a second to say the words I’ve been dying to say for so long. “I love you.”
“I love you too. So damn much. I love you. I love you. I love you.” He grins goofily. “I’ve been wanting to say it for so long, and now that I have, I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop. I love you.”
A giggle slips free, but I quickly turn serious again. “It’s exciting, but it’s also slightly terrifying. I’ve loved someone before, but he broke my heart, and now?—”
“I’m not going to mess this up again. I see what a gift you are. I’m not going to take you for granted and risk losing you.”
Another flash of lightning brightens the whole sky as I tug Jax to the wicker chairs on my front porch. “Can youtell me what’s been going on with you over the past few days?”
“My dad came to Roots.”
“What?” My jaw drops, and I reach out for his hand. I know how tumultuous his relationship was with his dad, and I know the terrible things that man did to Jax and his mom. “Are you okay? How did he get here? I thought you said he was on parole?”
Jax fills me in on everything from his dad showing up on his porch to his mom finding the letter.
“What does your mom think about all of this?”
He picks at the flaky wood on the arm of the chair. “She wants to hear him out.”
“How doyoufeel about it now that you’ve had some time to process it?”
An ominous cloud of thunder rumbles, but it sounds a little further away than the last one. “I don’t feel like I owe him anything after what he’s done to our family, but I want to move on from the pain.”
“You deserve that.”
He pauses picking at the wood to look up at me. “I don’t want to do it without you by my side though. I know it’s going to be hard to sit there and let him talk, but I think I can do it if you’re with me.” He glances out at the sky as lightning flickers in the distance. “All of this has helped me realize I can’t carry the weight of everything on my shoulders alone. I need to find someone I can dance in the rain with. Will you be that person?”
He stands, taking my hand and pulling me from the cover of my porch, down the steps and into the mud. Callie’s truck starts up, and her headlights flash on. She gives me a thumbs-up from the driver’sseat before turning her radio on at full blast. John Michael Montgomery’s “I Love the Way You Love Me” streams out of the truck.
“I love you, Freckles, more and more with each passing second. I messed up, and I want to make it right. When you’re at your weakest, and you only have ten percent to give, I’m supposed to help carry the other ninety percent for a little bit, but I’m also supposed to let you do the same for me. Relationships are about give and take.” He slips a hand to my waist. “They’re about learning to dance in the rain, and I need you to know, with you, I’ll freaking frolic in the rain any day.”
He squints at me as rain drips down his face, but he’s still wearing a smile. “Will you dance in the rain with me? Both literally and metaphorically?”
I laugh at the cheesy metaphor, nodding eagerly. “I love you, Jax. I love you so much. I’m always going to be there for you, even when our minds play tricks on us. It’s you and me from now on, okay? We’re going to be honest with one another and support one another no matter what.”
He spins me around then pulls me close, pressing his lips to mine. Rain drips down our faces. It seeps through my clothes and chills me to the bone, but with Jax’s strong arms holding me steady, I let it all go. Let the rain soak me. Let people think what they want about our relationship. Let my mind play tricks on me because I know in my heart that Jax and I together are stronger than anything we might face.
Chapter Fifty-Four
Jax
My nerves tumblearound my stomach as we pull into the parking lot of Dad’s new place in Oklahoma. Mom and Aunt Carol shuffle out of their seats seemingly as soon as I stop the truck, but I’m still sitting in the driver’s seat, twisting the beaded keychain Lauren gave me before we left in my fingers. Each bead on it represents a part of our journey, whether it’s a whiskey glass for the night she tried to kiss me or dancers for our first swing lesson. Lauren said it was supposed to bring me luck and remind me that I’m loved.
I don’t think I need it when I have her by my side, but I slip it into my pocket anyway, releasing a sigh.I can do this.
Lauren gingerly slips her hand into mine, quieting all the noise in my head and easing my stomach. “I’m by your side the whole way.” She kisses my cheek. “Thank you for letting me be here for you.”
I squeeze her hand. “Thank you for not giving up on me.”
She gifts me one of her beautiful smiles before nodding toward the truck door behind me as if to saylet’s do this.
Aunt Carol knocks on my window. “Is everything okay?”
I open my door. “I can’t say I’m ready for this, but then again, I don’t think I’ll ever be.”
Mom loops her arm through mine on the opposite side of Lauren, and we all walk toward the external stairwell together.
Mom does the honor of knocking, and Dad opens the door seconds later. He must’ve been waiting on the edge of his seat for us to show up. His desperation to make amends is evident from the pleading look in his eyes. I can’t reconcile the man standing in front of me with the man I knew growing up.
