“What’s going on here?” I asked.
“Have you never built a pillow fort before?” James teased.
“Yeah, when I was ten.”
“I didn’t want to sleep alone,” Shi said bashfully, “and James said you’re a bed hog.”
“I am not! But count me in.” Because I damn sure wasn’t going to miss out on the attention, I chose a spot close to Shi. “Have you two eaten?”
“Not yet,” Shi said. “We were waiting for you, and now I think my stomach is trying to digest itself.”
James laughed and wiggled out from beneath their head. They grumbled, but seeing as James couldn’t bring them their food while they were on top of him, they allowed it—and promptly curled up inmylap instead. My hand fell to their hair; apparently sober-Shi loved it as much as drunk-Shi did.
“Want to talk?” I asked, twisting a curl around my finger.
Shi pressed their lips together, eyes glossing over in the faint light of the TV. For a moment, I thought they weren’t going to tell me. Then they blurted it out in one swoop. “Michael started dating my high school bully. Whatever, I could deal with that if she makes him happy. But he brought her home for our Christmas in Houston.”
“I’m assuming your family didn’t know how she treated you?”
They shook their head. “I never said anything to anyone, and after I saw how happy Michael was, I couldn’t bring myself to tell them even now. He never lets himself be happy. Then, she…” Shi cleared their throat, finding a loose thread on their borrowed t-shirt to play with. “She dead-named me.”
My heart cracked in two. “Shi?—”
“It was an accident. I know that.”
“That doesn’t make it okay.” I combed through their hair, and they leaned into the touch. “What happened after that?”
“She didn’t like being corrected. It caused a big argument between her and Michael, and that wasbeforemy parents jumped in—which was exactly what I didn’t want to happen. I slipped out in the middle of the night. I didn’t realize Michael had followed me, and by the time he caught up to me, I guess I was too drunk to see straight. He told me he dumped her, but that only made me feel worse.” Poor Shi Baby. They felt so strongly, they’d probably drunk themself into a stupor to escape.
I shuddered at how close they’d come to dying that night. “Where’s your brother now?”
“On his way back to Texas,” they sighed. “He came by the bar and apologized first. We’re good now, but it was just…”
“A lot of emotions at once,” I finished for them. I knew the feeling all too well after meeting Hannah. “I get it. I’m sorry, Shiloh.”
They said “thanks” so quietly that I almost missed it and brushed the tears from their eyes. “And thank you for letting me stay here. James assured me you wouldn’t have a problem with it.”
“He was right. You know you’re welcome here any time.”
James re-entered the room with a plate in each hand, saving Shiloh from more uncomfortable conversation.
Once we’d eaten, Shi reclaimed their place spreading over the both of us, legs on me and their head in James’s lap. Heart racing, I shifted closer to James, trying not to disturb Shi as they fell quiet. My hand fell to their thigh, rubbing soothing shapes into the skin, and it seemed to be just what they needed to drift off to sleep.
Damn it.Just when I’d adjusted to sharing my heart with one person, someone else worked their way right in there.
Before I could spiral, James leaned over and brushed his lips over the cleft of my ear. “Don’t overthink it, love. I’ve been doing that enough for the both of us. Especially after the other night.”
“We’ve run out of time to put off talking about it, haven’t we?”
“I think so, but I’m their boss, Ryder. This is inappropriate.”
“Then that makes whatwedid highly inappropriate, don’t you think?” I teased.
James, however, didn’t find it very funny. His smile faded, and he watched the sleeping person between us. “I don’t even know if they want me that way.”
“They do,” Shi murmured. “And they don’t appreciate being talked about like they aren’t in the room.”
James and I shared a look of embarrassment. “Sorry, Shi. We thought you were sleeping.”
