I needed her. No one talked to me like she did. No one pushed my boundaries and kept me in line like her. No one had ever made me see myself in ways I’d never considered before. And after the scare with Lyra, I never wanted another day to go by where Wyn didn’t know what she meant to me.
“I care about you, Wyn—a lot. I’d go on caring about you, even if you’re not…” I cleared my throat. “…if it doesn’t take. And if it does, I want to do it together. I want us to do it together. And I want us to love each other. I want us to be a family, a real one.”
One that both Lyra and Wyn had been deprived of. One we’d been robbed of far too young.
“I love you,” I said, knowing the truth of it in my gut. “I’ve loved you a long time, and if you’d let me, I’d take such good care of you.”
“I hate that I took the choice from you.” She shook her head and closed her eyes.
“I chose it,” I said. “I’m choosing it now. I mean, can’t you feel it? What it is when we touch, when we’re together? My magic sings.”
I held my breath and waited for her to clench my heart between her beautiful fingers.
CHAPTER 9
Morwyn
Fen’s confession burned through my chest like a furnace, like someone had twisted my internal thermostat to scalding and left me to roast.
My magic sings.
Yes, that was one way to describe it. When I woke up this morning alone, the threat of his permanent absence had coated my insides with lead, and though I would have forced myself to live with it, seeing him with someone else would have sent my wolf into a territorial rampage. We both had changed since we were children, but I could admit, I’d loved him a long time.
Was that the same as being in love with someone? And could such a thing happen within a week? Could affection born in a tentative friendship shift to that of mates so quickly? Or was I simply overthinking it?
Yes, my wolf howled, thwapping her tail impatiently. Shut up. Feel.
Last night, I wanted nothing more than him. Always. Forever. And today, I wanted the same. I likely would tomorrow and the day after. He’d managed to etch himself inside of me in ways no one else ever had. When I reached out to him with my senses, our half-formed bond echoed with fear and the rank sweat of imminent disaster. He expected me to walk away from this. For the first time in years, Fen teetered on a knife’s edge, waiting for me to shove him off.
But nothing in me wanted that. No, I wanted to wrap myself in his arms and hold him through the rest of this horrible day. I wanted to comfort him in every way I could, more than a healer would do for a patient’s family, more than I’d ever wanted to do that for anyone else. I didn’t just want him to take care of me, but I wanted to care for him, too. Like a family.
“I feel the same way, Fen,” I finally said, and his shoulders dropped as he heaved a deep sigh of relief.
“Really?” He grinned, and it lit a spark inside of me, echoing down to my toes.
I nodded. “Yes. Maybe our story isn’t like all the others. Maybe there’s no instant shift in reality or knowing looks across the room. But I felt it last night…this thing between us. That’s why I bit you. That’s why I couldn’t stop.”
He covered the mark with his free hand while he squeezed mine tighter. “I’ll mark you back. I swear it. It’s just…”
Fen’s features dropped like he’d suddenly remembered where we were and what had happened to Lyra earlier tonight.
“I know,” I said. “She’ll be okay. Whatever it is, we’ll get her through it.”
“Thank you, Wyn.” He rubbed his forefinger and thumb over his eyes. “Thank you for helping her. Thank you for everything.”
“You don’t have to thank me,” I said. “It’s what I was put here to do.”
I truly believed that. If there were such a thing as fate, it had picked me to be this pack’s healer as soon as I was born. Like an alpha, I had the scent, and the previous healer took me under her wing as soon as I could walk. For me, there was never any other choice. Maybe mate magic was like that. I’d known Fen my entire life, and while I’d never recognized it before, an undercurrent of something more had always run between us.
We sat at the table and talked for another hour, and when my eyelids stuck every time I blinked, I forced myself to stand and guide Fen back to the infirmary. When we got to Lyra’s bed, Caelum occupied the seat next to it, one hand in hers, his head resting on the mattress with his eyes closed, deep in sleep.
“Come,” I said, nodding toward my office. “I’ve got a pull-out we can crash on.”
Fen followed like a lost puppy, and I grabbed a few blankets while he removed the cushions and yanked out the setup. He settled on the side closest to the door, and I crawled into the lumpy bed on the other side. I’d never had a good night’s sleep on this thing, but when he put his arm around my waist and tucked me in close to his chest, I let myself relax for the first time that day. I intertwined his fingers with mine and held him closer, waiting for his breathing to even out before I closed my eyes and sank into unconsciousness.
The next few days bled into each other as Lyra healed and Fen hovered like a mother hen. He refused to leave her side for more than an hour, and even then, he made sure either Caelum or me was there to watch over her. When I finally released her on New Year’s Eve, she snarled at him to keep him from helping her down the hallway and back to her dorm.
“I’m fine,” she barked, shoving his hands away. “Gods damn it, Fen. If you don’t find someone else to pester, I’ll beg Kodiak put you on a long run to get you out of my hair.”
