“Sometimes,” Demi said, honestly. “Not all the time, though. Daddy got a lot of business to handle. I can’t be home all the time. You getting older. You can hold it down when I’m gone. You think you could handle that?”
“Not yet, Dad. That’s what I got you for. You make sure me, and Ma are safe. So, you have to move to the new house with us,” DJ said.
Demi’s shoulders bricked. He had always wanted to be present for his son. It was one of the reasons he had made sure to make it work with Lauren because he couldn’t see himself being away from his kid. He had been a super father over the years. He hadn’t missed a beat with DJ. He had given his son every fatherly connection he wished his father had given him growing up. Their bond was solid, but in this moment, Demi felt like he was stuck. Leaving Lauren felt like the same thing as leaving his son and he couldn’t do that. He wouldn’t. Charlie wasn’t worth that. No matter how much he loved her. He couldn’t choose her over his child.
“What if I didn’t DJ? If a day came when I didn’t live with you and your mom? How would that make you feel?” Demi asked.
He was praying for clarity. Searching for strength in his son that would make him feel okay about deciding to move out, but when DJ’s eyes prickled, Demi knew there was no way this would not hurt. Their little family, the three of them, was DJ’s foundation, his sense of normalcy, his confidence, his security came from their unity. How could Demi divide that? Destroy that? For pussy? Only Charlie was more than pussy, but was she more than temporary?
“I don’t want that, Dad,” he said. “Everything would be all messed up. You said you and Ma weren’t getting a divorce! That’s what divorced people do! They live in different houses! Are you going to live somewhere else?”
His son was trying to be tough. His chest was poked out, but the tremor in his voice gave away his weakness. Demi pulled his son close. “Nah, DJ, Daddy ain’t going nowhere, man. We just talking. I’ma stay with you and your mom.”
He spent the rest of the morning with his son. He felt like he had something to apologize for. The notion of leaving his family was crazy. His mind told him it was, but his heart, his heart wasn’t even with him. It was back at the condo with Charlie,waiting for him to double back and retrieve it like it was some item he had forgotten to take with him on his way out the door. He dropped his son off at school after lunch, and as he walked him into the building, Demi paused, turning to DJ.
“No matter what, I love you, man. Remember that. You’re me without all the bad. You’re made of everything good, DJ. l Iove you and no matter what, I’ma always be here for you. No matter where I am, you hear me?”
DJ nodded and Demi gave him a light push to his head. “A’ight, boy, get to class.”
“See you at my game!”
“Yup, top of the stands, baby boy. You know where to find me,” Demi said. DJ ran back over to him and they did their handshake. Two slaps, pinkies locked, then drop it. DJ took off running down the hall as Demi watched until he disappeared around a corner.
“Fuck, man,” Demi muttered. He didn’t know what he should do. He knew what he wanted to do. He knew what he needed to do, but he couldn’t. He just couldn’t. For now, he would have to do both.
Chapter 16
No, noooo, come on, don’t do this right now!” Charlie cried as she turned her key over in her ignition. The engine sputtered and her entire car shook but it wouldn’t start. “I’m already late.” Charlie sat in the parking lot of Target, stranded. “I knew I should have left it running.” She had turned off her car to run in and grab a gift card for the occasion, only to come out to chaos.
She picked up her phone and dialed Stassi, only to be sent to voicemail.
“Come on, Stassi!” she said, sucking her teeth. Demi was her next call. She knew he was busy. She hoped she wasn’t crossing lines, but he had told her to call him first when she needed something. She prayed he meant it.
“Talk nice to me, Bird,” he answered.
She smiled. Only Demi could make her smile when she was completely overwhelmed.
“Hey, babe,” she greeted. “Are you busy?”
“A little but what up?” he replied.
“I’m stranded. My car died and I’m late to this family thing. I wasn’t gonna call you, but Stassi didn’t answer and...”
“Where you at?” he interrupted.
“Target, on Miller Road,” she said.
“I’m on my way,” he answered. That was all he needed to say for Charlie to feel saved. If he said it, he did it and he didn’t do it halfway, so she knew the problem would be solved. A man. Her man. She couldn’t believe it. After everything she had beenthrough, it was hard to trust in it because niggas had always led her astray. It was the pace that made Charlie give into it. It was happening too fast to be manipulative. What they were doing was impulsive, it was passionate. She loved it. She loved him. She didn’t care that it was what most would call “too soon.” She knew what she felt in her heart and that was enough.
When she saw Demi’s Cadillac pull into the parking lot a half hour later, she felt instant relief.
“I’m so sorry,” she said as she climbed from the car to greet him. Demi commanded her chin between his fingertips, pulling her lips to his. A quick peck, probably because he couldn’t give more without his soul dying a little, and then his face in the groove of her neck as he hugged her, picking her up. He walked her to the passenger seat of the car, seeing her safely inside before going to the driver’s side.
“I missed you,” she said when he climbed inside. How? It had only been hours since being in his presence, but that didn’t make it any less true.
“Show, don’t tell, Bird,” he said. Charlie smiled mischievously as she reached for the seat of his denim.
“Slow down. You press go on that and you ain’t going to ya daddy’s little dinner,” Demi said.
