No one had laughed because only Matt really knew Debbie. Nicholas hadn’t spoken to her for thirteen years. Bradley’s connection to her was even more tenuous. Garland’s was nonexistent.
“I think Debbie just wants her job back,” Matt had said.
Garland had nodded. “She’s the client. At least, she will be, if she so chooses.”
“Fine,” Bradley had said. “Let’s assume she’s your client. What are you going to do?”
“We,” Garland had said. “What are ‘we’ going to do. Every one of us will have to pitch in. But the most important person in this room is Nicholas. The media is his area of expertise. And, if we’re going to win in the court of public opinion, we’ll need his help.”
Nicholas had smiled thoughtfully. “First things first. Can anyone tell me what a news cycle is? Anyone other than Bradley, that is.”
Bradley had groaned. “Heard all about it for years. Got the t-shirt.”
“Go ahead and fill us in,” Garland had said to Nicholas.
Nicholas had then explained that a news cycle was 24 hours max, that even if they got a compelling human interest segment on that evening’s local news, it would be stale by the next evening. That MCU would not reverse course over one day’s bad press. That their little group needed to map out at least a 10-day campaign with fresh angles for each news cycle.
Nicholas had said he would do his best to guide things behind the scenes. He felt certain he could manage two days of coverage. Anything beyond that would only come if the story captured the public’s attention.
Vince toasted Matt. “Here’s to you! I don’t know how you pulled it off, but that was amazing, turning that local story into national news!”
“It wasn’t just me,” Matt said. “There was a team of us. A lawyer and a media guy, for starters. All of us gay. So, we were more than the ‘A-Team.’ We were the ‘Gay Team.’”
Vince chuckled. “I might be able to work that ‘Gay Team’ gag into my act.”
Matt shrugged. “Or you could have that ‘Gay Team’ on your side. What would you say if I told you we could do for you what we did for Debbie?”
Vince just laughed. “Nobody’s gonna give a shit if a part-time drag queen gets fired! Least of all Katie Couric.”
Matt shook his head. “What I mean is, what if I had a plan that would get you national press? Huge national press. A story that would catch the attention of important people in New York or Los Angeles? The kind of people who could get you on theTonight ShoworThe Late Showwith David Letterman?”
Vince eyed Matt skeptically.
“You told me that was what you wanted,” Matt said. “The night we flip-fucked in this hotel. Remember? You said you wanted to be the next Dame Edna. Do you still?”
Vince nodded. “Okay, I’ll bite. What’s this story that will make me a star?”
Matt took the Solo cup and poured in a half shot, tossed it back. “First, I need to tell you about a cockroach named Colton Langley…”
Matt gave Vince the highlight reel of Colton’s reign of terror: Adam’s near suicide. Trying to get Paul expelled. Debbie’s firing…
Then, Matt explained his plan… Bella Bottoms would have the starring role in the scandal that would take down Colton and end his political dreams. The headlines would practically write themselves, involving, as they did, a U.S. Senator, a drag queen, Midwest Christian University, and Colton Langley: poster boy for wholesome heterosexuality.
Bella—or another drag queen, if Bella didn’t step up—would almost certainly make the talk show circuit, milking the story for weeks. If that didn’t open up career possibilities, nothing would.
“A lot of things could go wrong with your plan,” Vince said. “For starters, I could go to jail. I’d almost certainly get roughed up by Oklahoma City’s finest.”
Matt nodded. Both of those were real possibilities, and he wasn’t going to minimize them. “A lot of things could also go spectacularly right. Only you can decide if it is worth the risk.”
Vince went silent, turned his attention to the vanity mirror, and touched up some eyeliner.
Matt waited him out, letting Bryant Gumbel and Katie Couric make his case.
Day 1had involved a human-interest story about the lady who got fired by MCU just days before Christmas. No mention was made of the reason for the termination. Just a brief interview with Debbie and her spokesman, Garland Stone-Dancer. Debbie’s modest Christmas tree twinkled in the background. Cleopatra napped on her lap.
Garland had talked about the true meaning of Christmas, Goodwill, Peace on Earth, the whole bit—wondering aloud about the heartlessness of Debbie’s firing. It was an intentionally soft opening salvo, one that wouldn’t have been aired were it not for the efforts of a certain assistant producer.
MCU had no comment, as had been expected. They were following their standard playbook.
