“Orion,” she said softly, in a tone that sent shivers down his spine, “this is how I make my living. You, as a knight, earn wages from the king. Weallhave to earn our wages, and since I have no husband, it is especially difficult for me to earn money. I cannot have you impeding my ability to feed my children.”
“I never intended to.”
“Good,” she said. “Because I will be entertaining later this afternoon and I shall not send him away.”
His jaw twitched faintly. “I have not asked you to.”
“Thank you,” she said. “I am glad we are clear on the subject.”
He nodded, unable to look at her, and she started to walk away. But he stopped her.
“Anosia,” he said hoarsely. “May I ask you how much you make every month? Does it vary from month to month?”
She paused, thinking on his question. “I am not certain that is your business.”
“I know,” he said, finally lifting his eyes to look at her. “You do not have to tell me exactly. If you can just give me an estimate. Please?”
She thought a moment. “I can earn anywhere from ninety to one hundred and ten pounds a year,” she said. “One year, I earned one hundred and twenty. My husband earned seventy pounds a year from the Earl of… Let us say that he earned seventy pounds a year. I must give at least twenty percent to Lord Chester, leaving me with about what my husband made every year. It is enough to feed my children and provide them with a nice home. They want for nothing.”
Orion looked at her, fully. “If I paid you eighty pounds a year to stop working here, would you consider it?” he said, sounding as if he were pleading. “If I begged you to marry me, would you? I know it is foolish, but I cannot stomach the thought of you dancing for the coins they throw you, or reading to old men who simply want to look at your lips and think lascivious thoughts, or appreciate your heaving breasts as you breathe. They do not respect you for the right reasons, Anosia. I know that is not your name and I hate calling you that, but you have given me nothing else.”
She looked at him in shock. “Oh… Orion,” she finally breathed. “You should not say such things. You will hate yourself for doing so.”
He shook his head, his jaw tense with emotion. “I will not,” he said. “I mean every word. Please… may I at least know your real name?”
She made her way back to him. Taking him by the hand, she led him over to the stone bench that was built into the windowsill. She sat him down, standing next to him as she gazed down upon his sad, lowered head.
“Now,” she said calmly, “what is this all about? You behave as if I am the only woman you have ever spoken to in your entire life, and I know that is not true.”
He was looking at the floor, at her feet. But she was standing so close that he reached out to take her hand, her soft fingers in his big, rough mitt. She tried to pull away but he held her hand tightly.
“Is there nothing about me you find attractive?” he finally asked. “Is there nothing I can say that interests you in the least? Or must I face the fact that you do not find anything redeemable about me?”
She smiled faintly because the man was beginning to wallow in self-pity. “Of course I find you attractive,” she said. “You are a glorious example of a man, finer than anything I have ever seen. But…”
He looked up at her. “Butwhat?”
“But you are a knight for the king,” she said. “You come from a fine family who, I am certain, are expecting you to make an advantageous marriage. How do you think they will react when you tell them that you found your wife at Aphrodite’s Feast, entertaining men?”
“Do you let them bed you?”
Her warm expression faded. “That is truly none of your affair.”
“Does that mean you have something to be ashamed of?”
“I have done nothing to be ashamed of.”
“Then you do not let them bed you.”
“As I said, that is none of your affair.”
Orion was verging on losing control. He was holding her hand, positioned close to her, and she was being evasive with him. He was doing what he’d accused old men of doing—watching her lips as she spoke, wondering what it would be like to kiss those lips. He was obsessing over a woman he hadn’t evenkissed, which was ridiculous, but he couldn’t get her out of his head. Without anything to say to her, because she was right and he knew it, he simply lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it warmly, gently, and sweetly.
“I am sorry,” he whispered, his mouth against her flesh. “Forgive me. But there is something about you I cannot put out of my mind, no matter how much I try to. I am an honorable man, Anosia. My intentions are true. But if you would rather stay here and entertain men for money, then clearly, you prefer that over an honorable marriage. I have no recourse for that. I am sorry if I have angered you. That was not my intention.”
With that, he stood up, towering over her as he kissed her hand again and gazed deeply into her eyes. It was such an intimate moment, full of power and promise if Anosia would only relent. It was clear, as she gazed up at him, that her willpower was wavering. Perhaps everything was wavering.
Perhaps she just couldn’t resist him anymore.
