“Have you ever heard me do it?” His eyes seemed to grow distant, like he was literally replaying our previous interactions.
“No. I don’t think I have. That’s actually pretty impressive. It’s so easy to just litter conversations without even thinking. I probably swear too much.”
He kept using the word impressive, and I wanted to throw the line fromThe Princess Brideat him. That maybe it didn’t mean what he thought it did, because nothing about me was impressive. It was pathetic. Embarrassing. Weak. I was. I was all those damn things.
Harley never seemed to judge me, or act like there was something wrong with me. Why didn’t he see what I could see? That I was too awkward for normal social interactions?
“You wanna know something I haven’t told anyone? I feel like sharing something deep about me might help take the pressure off you a bit. Not that I’m adding any, but I know everything around us adds some.”
I sipped my mocha and nodded, wondering what he could possibly tell me that would even compare to my nightmare life.
“I’ve got a daughter.”
That was the last thing I’d expected to hear from him. I thought it’d be motorcycle related, or maybe feelings related, but that was huge.
“Oh wow, really?”
He rested his free hand around his coffee, but he was still holding mine with the other, and I liked that. It felt safe.
“Yeah. The whole rushing into it thing. That’s what I’m saying. Waiting for the right person and the right time is something I wish most of us had, but it’s the one thing most people rush right into. I was sixteen, my girlfriend was sixteen, and we didn’t get it right. As a result, I have a daughter who’s seventeen now, and fuck, I hope she makes better life choices than I did.”
A practically adult daughter! Actually that was a relief, because the idea of having to be around a child was just as terrifying as literally everything else in life.
“Do… does she live with you?”
He shook his head. “I see her a few times a year, holidays and stuff, but I guess that’ll be less common now she’s practically an adult herself. She’s great. Her name’s Leah, and she’s, well, I wouldn’t do things differently for the world, because I couldn’t imagine her not existing, but…” he trailed off, glancing around us uneasily, “literally nobody in my life knows about her, and I’d prefer it stay that way. She’s… I don’t want her around people like Rocket, you know?”
It was odd that he singled out the very man he seemed to be going into business with, wasn’t it?
“He’s a predator?”
Harley shrugged, finally shaking his head. “No. Probably not, but I want better for her than someone like me. I’m not ashamed of who I am, but guys like me, we’re not exactly a catch.”
“You don’t think of yourself as a catch?”
He laughed, dragging a hand through his brown hair, and how did he look so hot doing that?
“I mean, I’m a single father, who spends all day on motorcycle related activities, so I get that it’s not what many women are looking for.”
“You’re a man who has his own business, which he’s the best at, and he has a daughter he loves, despite being so young when she was born. Nothing about that should be seen as points against you.”
Harley squeezed my hand gently. “See? You can converse with me easily when you stop worrying about what to say. And maybe one day I’ll believe you about that, but today’s not that day. How’s your coffee?”
I blinked at the sudden subject change, and sipped it again, offering him a smile. I saw what he was doing. Keeping me focused on talking, but in a way that didn’t give me time to overthink or stress.
“It was working so well, but I just slipped again,” I said sheepishly. Harley suddenly flinched, and burst out laughing.
“What’s up?” He was reaching into his jeans pocket, leaning back in his seat to drag his phone out.
“Put it on vibrate so it wouldn’t interrupt us. That was an epic fail, huh?”
He read something on the screen and groaned. “Oh great. Episode two hundred of the Rocket and Grease show.”
I shrugged at him as he gulped the last of his coffee and set his mug down.
“Wanna see something funny?”
I hesitated and he smiled. “Grown men acting like babies? You can stand by the door so you don’t get overwhelmed.”
