Harley chuckled. “It was a joke, but thank you. I think this is the first time we’ve seen each other outside of the shop, huh?” He knew it was a fact, just like I did. This was how normal people started conversations. My cheeks were still a little pink withembarrassment at missing his joke, but he didn’t seem to mock me for it.
“I’m glad we did this,” he said next, running his finger around the rim of his coffee mug, my eyes following the movement.
“I’m not very good at… at normal people stuff,” I said, keeping my eyes on his finger, because I didn’t want to see the pity or mocking I’d usually see. Not from him. Never from him.
Harley sat back in his seat, his finger leaving the mug’s rim.
“I’m not good at tons of things. Trust me. Never ask me to choose a meal in a restaurant. I get a load of choices in front of me, and I can take all night with it.”
Wow. I’d had the same problem myself before. I finally braved looking at him, and saw a passive look on his face. He wasn’t mocking me, nor was he embarrassed. Was he saying it just to make me feel better?
“I… I’m not a people person. Too many people. Too much noise. I get… they overstep boundaries, and I panic.”
Harley’s brow creased and he leaned forward a little, resting his arms back on the table.
“People overstep your boundaries? Do they touch you?”
I swallowed hard, looking over to check on my motorbike, which was happily resting on its stand, glowing in the autumn sunlight.
“I mean… most people are okay with being touched, right?”
He reached for my hand, then stopped and literally rolled his eyes when I looked at him.
“And this bellend goes to touch you right after you say that. What a dick.” I opened my mouth to argue, because for some reason, his touch didn’t bother me, but he shook his head.
“Nobody should ever touch you without your consent, Caroline, and I’m sorry for every time that’s happened. With others, but also with me. Especially with me. I shouldn’t do that.”
“It’s okay!” I blurted, because the thought of him never touching me again actually felt worse than the idea of another person touching me. How that was possible, I had no idea.
“It’s not.”
“I… I like it when it’s you,” I whispered, biting my lip to try and stop more words from slipping out. Ionlylike it when it’s you. Iloveit when it’s you. You’re theonlyone who doesn’t make me feel coated with wrongness afterward.
“What if I liked touching you, Caroline? What if I liked it so much, I wanted to do it again?”
I took a breath, because I knew the answer to this one.
“I’ve never had sex!” What? That wasn’t it! That wasn’t the answer to his question! I gasped and covered my face with both hands, but I saw it before I hid, I saw the look on his face. Shock. Confusion. Then the worst one.Pity.
Chapter Six
ITHOUGHT I KNEW how today would go, once I had the message from Caroline. I thought we’d meet for coffee, chat a little, and that would be that, no matter how much I would have liked something more. Another date, another something. I liked her company, and I adored how cute she became when she was out of her depth, something I was realising happened more often than I’d noticed in the past. Just the noise level in the coffee shop had seemed to crush her spirit, and she seemed to be shrinking into herself a little more every second.
This was the woman I was interested in? Someone who absolutely wouldn’t like anyone I know, or want to be around the clubhouse, or any gatherings? Just Rocket had been too much for her, and he wasn’t the loudest or the most obnoxious. For the record, Stag held that honour, and he wasn’t alone in that. Plenty of them were mouthy fuckers.
Still, her accidental admission…the fact that she was a virgin… that had my attention. It wasn’t so much a creepy thing, like how much I wanted to break in the sweet little untouchedthing. That wasn’t my way. Even thinking it that way had me feeling uneasy. No. It was more about the fact that she was struggling with so much, but she trusted me. She trusted me to be near her. To touch her. She trusted me with what was probably a well kept secret, or not, the way she accidentally blurted things when she was flustered. I knew I respected her for it. For the fact that she’d held onto something that so many throw away with the wrong person. Hell. I did, and I was still paying the price.
“Caroline?”
She made a distressed sound, and didn’t move her hands, but I needed to see her, and I needed her to seemeeven more.
“Can you please look at me, little lady? I’m nobody to fear, remember?”
“I’m too embarrassed,” she mumbled through her hands, and I really felt for her. I could see how she might be mortified, but I really wanted to soothe that for her. To make her realise she shouldn’t be hiding from me.
“It’s nothing to be ashamed of, Caroline. Quite the opposite.”
She seemed to stop breathing for a moment, and I figured she was listening at least, so I continued.
